Forced To Be Pregnant (Hadley Duvall)

The most shocking sentence of the night at the DNC was by Hadley Duvall, from Kentucky, "[Donald Trump] calls [total abortion bans] a 'beautiful thing,'" Duvall said. "What is so beautiful about a child having to carry her parent's child?"

What she was talking about was having an opportunity to have a medical abortion for an unwanted pregnancy from rape by a parent. Countless times when I speak up for women being able to have the OPTION of having or not having a child, Christians will say a person cannot be a CHRISTIAN if they support MURDER. To be clear, I do see aborting a fetus as murder. But I also see forcing someone to have a child as potential murder of the mother's spirit, life, as well as the child's spirit and life. There is no telling what kind a life an unwanted child may face. They may even become that person you fear most, a CRIMINAL.

Aborting a child, leaves questions of what that life could have been. But we don't have questions about what WILL be when a woman is raped. And if we listen, we can hear what it will be like for a woman forced to carry and deliver a child produced from rape or incest.

Christians only envision a BUNDLE OF JOY. A glowing PREGNANT woman, refusing to see the violence, ugliness the VESSSEL carrying the baby endured and will perpetually endure. I used the word vessel, because people who INSIST a woman carry a pregnancy reduces the woman to no more than a body acting as a machine to produce a product. To them, statistics about rape doesn't matter. Okay, it doesn't matter. But they are TRUE. And for women who have had this brutality in their life, they should be FREE from people who have no idea of the TRAUMA they have experienced, making decisions in their lives. To me, that is unchristian, Forcing Christian standards on people. It is not the job of Christians. The Bible does not advocate for FORCING Christianity on anyone. 

Have your beliefs. Share your beliefs. But give the living a chance to live their lives as they choose. Forcing a woman to have an unwanted pregnancy is cruel and will cause damage beyond what you will stick around to witness.

Did you know Sexual Assault Awareness Month is in April, each year? I had no idea either. Years ago, I wrote a poem about rape called Every Three Minutes. I entered the poem in a contest and came in third place and I was so delighted because I am not a poet. I did not research the actual statistic on how often a woman is raped. I just have a thing for the number three and decided to use it. I believe using such an impossible high number of women being raped every three seconds would make my poem more impactful to the reader. LITTLE DID I KNOW AT THAT TIME.

Rape is one of those uncomfortable topics people don't want to speak about like racism or mental illness. The difference is rape is a violent criminal act that remains unreported by many victims. It is the one crime where the victim feels shame or guilt that a crime happened to them. Another factor that causing the rape victim to feel even worse they have been sexually assaulted is the fact 80% of sexual assaults are committed by acquaintances. Yes. Friend, uncle, boyfriend, co-worker, and even spouse commit sexual assaults on people they know. Seventy percent of rapes are by someone the victim knows.

Rape is such an unexplainable type of violation. It is an unwanted person physically using a person's body without permission. The rapist is inside of the person's body. How can someone describe their body being stolen from their control? The victim's body is no longer under their own control. 

I have a confession. At one time when I would hear a woman say she was raped or molested as a child, young woman, or adult I would shake my head at the horror inflicted on her. As the years rolled on it seemed almost every woman had an experience of rape or sexual assault until it become normal for me to hear and the story of rape or molestation no longer shocked to me. The horror of the crime didn't lesson my sympathy for the woman, but it just became common to hear and expected as part of the female experience. Did you hear what I just said? 

As of 1998 17.7 million American women had been victims of attempted or completed rape. That is a high number right? Approximately 1.5 million intimate partner female rapes and physical assaults happen each year according to data gathered in a February 10, 2022 report by the Department of Justice www.ncbi.nih.gov/books/NBK499891.

The FBI's Uniform Crime Report as of January 1, 2013, redefined rape as "Penetration, no matter how slight, of the vagina or anus with any body part or object or oral penetrating  by a sex organ of another person, without consent of the victim.

Every 68 seconds an American woman is sexually assaulted. In the United States one rape occurs every 1-2 minutes (I guessed correctly for my poem sad to say). One out of every six American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime with 14% of the rapes completed and 2,8% of rapes attempted.

Eighty percent of sexual assaults are committed by an acquaintance and 80% of women experience a first-time sexual assault before the age of 25. Women between the ages of 16-19 are 4 times likely to be raped and women and men with disabilities are 2 times at risk of a sexual assault than people without a disability.  One in every 33 American men has experienced an attempted or completed sexual assault as a child. Twenty-eight percent first time sexual assault occurred at age 10 or younger.

It is important for me to include the fact children experience sexual assaults and never report it to family or authorities. Data reports 95% of child victims knew their sexual attacker. These sexual attackers are family members and friends of family members. Acting Commissioner of Police Edvin Martin said a surge in incest for 2020 compared to 2018-2019. There was a significant increase of incest during the height of Covid-19 lockdown period. 

People tend to have a blind eye when it comes to incest and that is how and why it continues to not be reported and allows 90% of these sexual assaults against children to occur in the home. Authorities estimate incest occurs in over 10% of American families, yet only 20% of the offenses are reported. The crime often goes unreported because it is initiated by someone the child, usually a girl, loves and trusts. Sibling incest is possibly the most common form of incest while 60% of the rapes occur in the home with 37% by a parent, 23% by a stepparent.

States with the highest incidence of incest are: Kentucky (the highest rate), Maine, Delaware, Virginia, Maryland, Washington, Georgia, Oregon, Indiana, New Mexico, Oklahoma, Louisiana, Tennessee, South Carolina, North Carolina, West Virginia, Montana, Alabama, and South Dakota. Since incest is rarely reported, there is not reliable statistics as to how many incest victims there are.

The Criminal Justice System: Statistics Rapes, Abuse, & Incest National Network gives reasons why sexual abuse is not reported:

20% of victims feared retaliation

13% believed police would not do anything

13% believed it was a personal matter

8% reported the rape to a non-law-enforcement official

8% believed it was not important enough to report

7% did not want the perpetrator to get into trouble

2% believed the police could not help

30% had other multiple reasons

It is important not to sweep sexual assaults under the rug because there are long lasting consequences to the assault. In 2012, Missouri's Republican Senate candidate, Todd Akin, said victims of a "legitimate rape" rarely get pregnant because their bodies can prevent them from doing so which sparked outrage throughout the country. Such statements as the one made by Todd Akins continues to downplay the crime of sexual assault against women which has long lasting consequences. 

Women who experience sexual assaults may have depression and substance abuse problems. It is estimated 90% of rape victims experience PTSD symptoms during the 2 weeks following the rape. And 30% report PTSD lasting up to 9 months and 33% contemplate suicide and 13% commit suicide. 

The most important thing a woman, person, should know is sexual assaults is not the victim's fault and there are no sure tried and true ways to prevent sexual assaults. There are ways to reduce the chances of rape in the link I have provided. One of the major tools in the effort to eliminate sexual assaults and abuse is to report the crime to adults and authorities. Reduce the Risk of Becoming a Sexual Assault Victim | Police & Public Safety | UNC Charlotte Only 5% of sexual assault reports filed are proven false. 

Men who commit rape can not be defind or identified by any fact based means. The prototypical convicted rapist is frequently under 25, shorter than average height, poor, and a resident of the inner city. many rapist live in college towns and rape during the evening hours. There have been 3 common characteristics of rapist noticed, lack of empathy, narcissism, and hostility towards women, but may not be true of all rapists. 

There are 3 catagories of rapists:

The Opportunist Rapist: this rapist seizes any chance for sexual gratification, such as loss of self control on the part of their victim under the influence of alcohol

The Sadistic Rapist: motivations are to humiliate or degrade the victim

The Vindictive Rapist: has anger and aggression focused directly towards women. Such a rapist believes he is permitted to sexually attack women because he feels he has been hurt, rejected, or wronged by women in the past

EVERY THREE MINUTES

By Dorothy Guyton

  

Every three minutes-slowly- count; One Two Three

A life is changed it is now filled with shame

Flesh ripped, bruises left, never to be the same.

 

Every three minutes-remember-count; One Two Three

A mother, daughter, sister, niece, shouts a silent scream

Mind clicks off, just survive, pretend it’s just a dream.

 

Every three minutes-you’re use to it-count; One Two Three

Knees drawn as she sits on the floor in the cold drumming shower

Trying to erase the assault on her that lasted forever but was actually under an hour.

 

Every three minutes-count them; One Two Three

Blank stares reflect- the now ghost looking back at her from a steamy misty mirror

Wishful hoping thinking, please, no one guess, please, no one dare see her.

 

Every three minutes a club is joined; One Two Three

Membership requires a forced relinquishment of pride of self -esteem

Flashbacks to the time of terror is one of the private club's dues and ongoing theme.

 

Ever three minutes a chain is formed; One Two Three

Each disfigured link is intertwined in her wounded broken spirit

Her soul's sad song whispers ‘No fair. Why me’ in each searching intrusive lyric.

 

Every three minutes-forgot to count; One Two Three

A crime of power rages, not about sex, but about toxic powerless masculinity

Another man's sickness of pinned up anger unleashed on unsuspecting femininity.

 

Every three minutes-you tire of it yet? One Two Three

Another woman silently accepts her fate thinking shit happens what’s the use

Violence excused 

given another name, another disorder, another acceptable label for abuse.

 

Every three minutes-slowly-count them; One Two Three

The word RAPE is hushed too ugly say; its just sex they say without foreplay

He's your friend, or your husband, or a stranger you led on in some way.

 

PENIS ENVY?

I have heard of the term Penis Envy, but never believed I would be a person who could be defined by such a definition. Penis envy in Freudian psychoanalysis refers to the theorized reaction of a girl during her psychosexual development to the realization that she does not have a penis. Freud considered this realization a defining moment in the development of gender and sexual identity for women. Freud seems to suggest when little girls realize they don't have a penis, the WANT one. In contemporary culture, the term sometimes refers inexactly or metaphorically to women who are presumed to wish they were men.

Envy is defined as a feeling of discontented or resentful longing aroused by someone else's possessions, qualities, or luck. 

According to Freud, the parallel reaction in boys to the realization that girls do not have a penis is castration anxiety. Young boys, it seems, after noticing girls who have no penis, become frightened that theirs will get cut off or taken away.

By Freud's discoveries, NO ONE WANTS A VAGINA. With legislation deciding certain medical treatments women are or are not allowed to have, maybe women will soon not have warm and fuzzy feelings about having a vagina, uterous, and ovaries. Because just like the little boys fearing their penis' will be taken away from them, woman are having their ownership of their sex organs/reproductive organs taken away from them. 

Hey Freud, when women notice men who have penis' can make all the rules, they decide, maybe they should grow "a pair too" so they can make some rules. Now that's real penis envy.

I must admit, it must be great to be a man these days. I mean, how many pieces of legislation have we voted on lately or in the past ten years regarding male reproductive rights. The penis is safely tucked away from the intrusive long arm (hand) of the law. What a peaceful existence. On the other hand the uterus has been in the spotlight forever. Contraceptive, IVF, and abortions, are all in jeapordy these days.

The importance on creating life and not aborting a life are the main reason women's healthcare rights are being mandated by law. Christians support these types of legislation because of their religious beliefs. Of couse we know tthe Bible instructs CHRISTIANS  to get married first and then to have a boat load of children. That is the "be fruitful and multiply part." Don't see a lot of that happening. Maybe because others just want to make sure others are living biblically whether they are Christian or not.

Pro Choice advocates have pointed to the need for abortions for instances of rape, incest, minor children sexually abused, threat of mother's life if pregnancy continues, or abnormalities of the fetus. There has not been any swaying of opinion by those who believe every fertilized egg has a right to form to a full term fetus. 

But statistics don't lie.

STATUTORY RAPE 69% of unmarried adolescent girls became pregnant when their partners were 6 or more years older, 3.7 times the pregnancy rate of those whose partners were no more than two years older (Darroch et al., 1999). According to the Vermont Youth Risk Behavior Survey, 3.5% of girls aged 13–15 reported voluntary sex with adult men (Leitenberg & Saltzman, 2000). The research confirms stereotypes about the risk for teenage girls: that statutory relationships carry higher risks of pregnancy, single-parenthood, and other psychosocial problems. 

RAPE In the United States, significantly more women than men are sexually assaulted. In 2022, about 442,754 women were raped or sexually assaulted in the U.S. - an increase from the previous year. In that same year, 89,053 men were raped or sexually assaulted, also a significant increase compared to the year before. 

INCEST 15% of families have reported having an incest event and 32 million Americans report being a victim of incest.

COMPLICATIONS OF PREGNANCY In 2021, 1,205 women died of maternal causes in the United States compared with 861 in 2020 and 754 in 2019 (2). The maternal mortality rate for 2021 was 32.9 deaths per 100,000 live births, compared with a rate of 23.8 in 2020 and 20.1 in 2019. About 1 in 33 babies (about 3 percent) is born with a birth defect in the United States each year. 

The snide person will say a woman shouldn't be sexually active if she doesn't want to become pregnant. This sounds like genius to me. One problem. SEXUALLY ACTIVE MEN.

IF YOU TAKE AWAY WOMEN'S REPRODUCTIVE RIGHTS, TAKE AWAY THE VIAGRA COMMERCIALS. THEY'RE SELLING LIKE CRACK.

The Woman Who Invented Viagra Posted on March 30, 2011, by IP

Dr. Gill Samuels, director of vascular biology at Pfizer, oversaw the discovery of compounds for reducing hypertension and migraines. More famously, she was part of a team of thousands working at Pfizer that invented Viagra, as she humbly lets everyone know. The discovery, she said, came in 1985 after 13 years of intense teamwork and laboratory experiments. She said: "We were looking at various disorders in vascular contraction when we came across this new class of compound that could relax blood vessels. I have heard people call it a lifestyle drug, but I don't think of it like that. It has caused men to think differently about their health. It has de-stigmatized erectile health and as someone who had to review all the letters of patients, who say, 'It has stopped me killing myself' or 'It has stopped me hitting my wife', that I realize what a good medicine it is," she said.

Since becoming available in 1998, Sildenafil, the chemical name of the little blue pill known as Viagra, has been a leading treatment for erectile dysfunction Its primary competitors on the market are tadalafil (Cialis) and vardenafil (Levitra). It used to be that men had the upper hand when it came to confidence in the bedroom. But health experts say ever-younger men are increasingly turning to Viagra in a bid to keep up with modern women inspired by the strong female characters in films such as Sex and the City, starring Sarah Jessica Parker. Relationship therapists are also seeing a rise in the number of men in their 30s asking about the impotence drug, traditionally prescribed to those more than two decades older.

Sildenafil's popularity with young adults has increased over the years. Sildenafil's trade name "Viagra" is widely recognized in popular culture, and the drug's association with treating erectile dysfunction has led to its recreational use. The reasons behind such use include the belief that the drug increases libido, improves sexual performance, or permanently increases penis size. Studies on the effects of Viagra when used recreationally are limited but suggest that it has little effect when used by those not suffering from erectile dysfunction.

 Abortion has been the lead word to all of the so called 'attacks' on women's rights. It is the life of the unborn child that is what is being defended. It is about murder. Somewhere in this discussion on the sanctity of life; the part of the man has been omitted. Scripture did not let them off of the hook when it came to the integrity of creating life. In chapter 9 of "When Will Eve Be Forgiven?" I look at the value God put on the creation of life:

    The primary purpose of a marriage in biblical times was to produce an heir. Each cycle of stories about the major ancestors shows the common theme of obtaining a male heir for the family and for the covenant with God.

When nature takes its course with women in menopause, childbearing ends. When nature (impotence) takes its course on men, Viagra sells boom. It is good for a man's health to continue to have an erection. Is the intent for the man to continue to be able to engage in sex to fulfill his marital biblical obligation to produce children or solely for pleasure? WHY is PLEASURE healthcare and not the damage rape, incest, maternal death, and congenital deformities not for women?

You can purchase my book When Will Eve Be Forgiven? To read more about women and their role in Christianity and the Christian family on amazon.com

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