The Pregnant Woman Means Less Than The Fetus

WANT TO GO ON A WILD RIDE ABOUT PREGNANCY? Well, keep on reading.

When you think about a PREGNANT woman, what are your thoughts? Do you envision a woman glowing with her hands encircling her extended rounded belly? Do you think and wonder if the little bundle of joy is a girl or a boy? Most people when they see a pregnant woman have sweet positive thoughts about baby and mommy. But there is another side of pregnancy that is never discussed.

In America, there is an ongoing discussion about ABORTION. The FETUS is center stage. The fetus's rights trumps the mother's rights. Her life is put into suspended animation, and she becomes a HOST or VESSEL for a new life. Saying a woman is a host or vessel sounds cruel and harsh. But when someone else is calling HER healthcare choices while she is pregnant, those people make her into forced vessel or host. After she gives birth, then she is SEEN once again. Negative consequences experienced DURING pregnancy comes AFTER the needs and wellbeing of the growing child.

I write about the debate regarding abortion. I look at it from many angles. Today I thought about the LIFE of a PREGNANT woman. I knew I had heard this is a time in a woman's life where she is vulnerable to domestic violence. The ABORTION debate focuses on the baby. WHO focuses on the pregnant woman?

Pregnancy can often be an especially risky period for IPV (Intimate Partner Abuse), as many women report that abuse started or intensified when they became pregnant. Each year, an estimated 324,000 pregnant people in the United States are battered by their intimate partners. Homicide is a leading cause of traumatic death for pregnant and postpartum women, accounting for 31 percent of maternal injury deaths. Women suffering from domestic violence MAY seek a medical abortion to save her life. the pregnancy can be a product of domestic violence and NOT PROMISCUITY as many believe. A woman may choose to not birth a child into domestic violence. Not wanting to see her potential child SUFFER also from abuse is a MATERNAL instinct. But people view this as cruel and can't get behind such a decision.

Abuse often gets worse during pregnancy. The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (also called ACOG) says that 1 in 6 abused women are first abused during pregnancy. More than 320,000 women are abused by their partners during pregnancy each year. 

Every pregnancy isn't flowers and butterflies. Those who are pro-life still maintain circumstances don't matter when it comes to the life of a child. There is no reason for a woman to MURDER a baby. This is a visceral, emotional stance. People respond and react based on emotions. On that same note, women are often depicted as OVERLY emotional during pregnancy. Their reactions are often viewed as over the top. Most often this hormone driven behavior is demonstrated by mood swings and sudden onsets of crying. People just accept it as part of being pregnant. This is also another side of pregnancy for many. Women who are taking medication for mental health disorders prior to pregnancy often have to go off their much-needed medication regulating their mental health stability. An unplanned pregnancy for a person with certain mental health disorders, pose medical problems and major decisions for the pregnant woman.

Scientist are beginning to study the brains of pregnant women. They have noticed significant changes in the pregnant BRAIN. The research is in its early stages and at this time. Positive aspects of the changing pregnant brain have been documented. One of the negative changes during pregnancy linked to changes in the brain is DEPRESSION. Even though the pregnant woman is seen as glowing, her brain may say something different. We all love the birth of a little bundle of joy. But don't realize, mommy may be going through some things whether she is aware of it or not.

A study of more than 100 new parents showed that pregnancy and birth cause changes in brain circuits that may be involved in empathy and bonding with the child. How wonderful. Will ongoing studies reveal not every woman experience this change during pregnancy? What are the consequences for the pregnant woman or even the mother after giving birth if this change in the brain's circuits do not take place?

Researchers also think some of the brain changes pregnant people undergo might prepare them not only for parenthood but for childbirth itself—by increasing pain tolerance, for example. That is an extraordinary thing in my eyes. I only believed superheroes underwent such changes. This should make one believe a woman's health care is in better hands of a physician than government restrictions with such extraordinary bodily changes.

A deeper understanding of the cellular and system-level mechanism will improve the understanding of how pregnancy remodels specific circuits to promote MATERNAL BEHAVIOUR. Pinpointing the synchronicity of gray and white matter changes that unfold in the maternal brain could be key to understanding the behavioral adaptions that emerge during and after pregnancy, such as honing the brain's visual and auditory responses to infant cues and eliciting maternal behavior. Such brain changes are linked to perinatal depression. Neuroanatomical changes observed over the course of a human pregnancy | Nature Neuroscience. Perinatal depression is a mood disorder that occurs during pregnancy and after childbirth. The symptoms can range from mild to severe.

Can you imagine a pregnant woman being given the news her unborn child may have genetic defects which will not allow it to go to full term while under the influence of brain changes already existing which cause depression? What if she was told her preexisting condition or conditions she developed while being pregnant is endangering her life under such brain changes? How much worse will this type of news be for the pregnant woman who is refused needed medical care due to government regulations while under the brain changes of pregnancy?

Science is proving a pregnant woman is more than a vehicle for carrying a baby. While being concerned for the growing child, we can't overlook the needs of the pregnant woman which have been unaddressed for centuries. SOMETIMES her medical needs REQUIRE an abortion. Pro-life supporters must know, even though a pregnant woman's body is designed to promote the development, survival, and care of a baby, changes in her brain can be a time in which she is most destressed. And when things go wrong during a pregnancy, not being able to make life-saving decisions can lay the groundwork or susceptibility to mental illness. 

No. I'm not saying that is why or a good reason to have an abortion. I'm saying the mother needs just as much attention to HER wellbeing as the developing fetus and science is just NOW acknowledging a pregnant woman's brain is no longer like it was before pregnancy. I'm saying pregnancy is a COMPLICATED and often times DANGEROUS time for a woman. 

The most noticeable changes to the study participant’s brain throughout her pregnancy was a reduction in cortical gray matter volume which persisted after birth. The majority of the outside layer of the brain consists of gray matter, which has a main job of processing information in the brain and helps control thoughts, emotions, memory, and muscle movement. This honing and fine-tuning of the material, the brain, is a process that happens early in development, again during puberty, and pregnancy probably reflects another wave of cortical refinement.

Additionally, scientists found noteworthy increases in white matterTrusted Source located deeper in the brain, which they reported peaked in the second trimester and returned to normal pre-pregnancy levels around the time of birth. About 60% of the brain consists of white matter, which connects different areas of the brain together to help with communication for focus, learning, and balancing while moving.

All of the above are the POSITIVES of the changes of the pregnant brain. But the research is in its infancy. When a woman's health care is being discussed, people should remember it is an INDIVIDUAL experience for EACH pregnant woman. People are ONLY thinking about and addressing concerns for the unborn child overlooking the mother's need for consideration. Pregnant women go through things!

In a previous post titled, Viagra Is Healthcare?, I listed reasons for a MEDICAL ABORTION. I want people to realize people are not advocating for abortions per se, but for the RIGHT to make their own health care choices during pregnancy. Not all pregnancies are the result of PROMISCUITY as Christians and men would have you believe. Things go wrong during pregnancy. Nine months is a long time where anything can happen to the pregnant woman or fetus. It is a vulnerable time with changes science has yet to understand. When looking at A+B=C (A= man, B= woman, C=fetus), we only focus on C. No one is saying anything about A, the men in the abortion debate. Pregnant women, B, lose their rights in regard to HER health. It is not A+B=C+D (D=those against women having choice in their health care). D becomes the one calling the shots for A, B, and C.

All I'm trying to say in this post is, don't forget about the pregnant woman. She may be going through something while pregnant that only her physician can help with. If ANYONE reading this post has experienced the negative, or never thought of circumstances during their pregnancy, PLEASE SHARE your story with me. People need to remember YOU in the equation of pregnancy. That you went through some things as the CONSEQUENCE of being pregnant.

Thank you in advance.

Trusted Sourcevolume, which persisted after giving birth. 

Why Trumps "Truths" Always Win

What does a society do when everyone has their own version of TRUTH? 

At any given time and with any leaning of personal understanding, a person can find data to support their belief. If you believe the world is flat; you can find information on the internet to support your belief. Believe aliens built the pyramids, there is information on the internet to support that belief. NOTHING is off limits on the internet to being a truth no matter how farfetched. Everyone seems to believe their own PROOF of truth and there are large numbers of people believing the opposite of the another and ready to argue their RIGHTNESS with their proof.

Having a scientific background, I have relied on provable facts for my beliefs (except when it comes to my religion). Humans need a stable frame of reference. Religion fills this need. In effect, humans crave answers to questions that no other source of knowledge has an answer to, which only religion may seem to answer. Religion attracts followers because it satisfies all of the 16 basic desires that humans share: acceptance, curiosity, eating, family, honor, idealism, independence, order, physical activity, power, romance, saving, social contact, status, tranquility, and vengeance.

In high school, I can remember being taught about the Scientific Method for knowing if something was a fact.

The scientific method is a systematic way of conducting experiments or studies so that you can explore the world around you and answer questions using reason and evidence. The scientific method is the process of objectively establishing facts through testing and experimentation. The basic process involves making an observation, forming a hypothesis, making a prediction, conducting an experiment and finally analyzing the results. What your DATA shows from this method to be considered a fact, the conclusion of a research project has to be able to be replicated by OTHERS to make it a valid premise. Facts must be able to be proven.

In science, a scientific fact has to have the exact same outcome using the same information every time, no matter who is doing it.  EXAMPLE: to make Kool-Aid you will need to mix water, sugar, and Kool-Aid. Each and every time you follow this, no matter who does it, you will end up with Kool-Aid. The flavor can vary but it will always be Kool-Aid. Change or add another ingredient, then the outcome will be different and no longer TRUE Kool-Aid.

After learning the Scientific Method at a young age, it became my standard for evaluating TRUTH. I applied this chain of thought when formulating my beliefs on many things in life. Even in relationships it helped me when my self-esteem was bruised.

Say I dated a man who was handsome and charismatic. But he did not interact with me well and was dancing on the line of being emotionally abusive. When the relationship, which I wanted ended, I would reflect on whether his interactions with others, past and present resembled his interaction with me. My hypothesis that he probably treated others, not just me badly, usually could be seen and the next relationship he would enter would more than likely be the same unless he changed or added something to the ingredients that made him up. I could believe this as true if I could find information about his relationships showing the same factors. Then I knew it was HIM and not ME as the cause for the bad relationship. Just calling him a dog or bad person would not be quite factual. But gathering information from several of his relationships (family, friends, co-workers, ex-girlfriends), demonstrated his relationship style which was not what I wanted in a relationship. His past actions proved his present actions and more than likely predict his future actions. 

So why don't people apply the Scientific Method, in theory, to politics or life in general? 

Many of the decisions we make as individuals and as a society depend on accurate information: however, our psychological bias and predisposition make us vulnerable to falsehoods. As a result, misinformation is more likely to be believed, remembered, and later recalled even after we learn that it was false. Here is where 2 Peter 2:12-14 resonates, "But these people blaspheme in matters they do not understand. They are like unreasoning animals, creatures of instinct, born only to be caught and destroyed, and like animals they too will perish. They will be paid back with harm for the harm they have done. Their idea of pleasure is to carouse in broad daylight. They are blots and blemishes, reveling in their pleasures while they feast on you. With eyes full of adultery, they never stop sinning; they seduce the UNSTABLE; they are experts in greed - an accursed brood!" 

Take the relationship example. If I desperately wanted to be in a relationship, I would have ignored RED FLAGS, Family and friends, no matter what they said about my love interest, would not be able to get me to believe I was in a bad relationship. My brain would be WANTING him. My brain would be predisposed to listen to his lies and rationales for how he treated me even if it was causing me pain. My brain and predisposition would be overriding truth. Even if others were calling me crazy for staying with the man I desired, my brain would reject facts or what was clearly the truth. Even after the relationship ended, I would probably only remember what I considered the good times and his positive characteristics.

MAGA has everyone wondering how they can support Donald Trump for president. People have no problem calling MAGA a bunch of crazies who refuse to see the facts about Trump. And they are facts. Trump has a long list of nefarious dealings in the finance world, with women, and during his presidency. His character is equivalent to a school yard bully and a mafia boss man. There are FACTS testifying to his less than stellar character. These facts are readily available to be checked and scrutinized.

The Washington Post‘s Fact Checker team has finished its final catalog of the extent of the former president’s efforts to mislead and misinform us. According to its tally, Trump made more than 30,000 “false or misleading” claims during his presidency. Half of those lies were told during his last year in office, according to the Post‘s database.

Trump's take on Covid. “Just stay calm. It will go away.” - President Donald Trump, March 10, 2020. Dozens of times since the start of the outbreak that has killed 1.7 million people around the world, Trump publicly downplayed the severity of the novel coronavirus, suggesting it would go away on its own, while comparing Covid-19, the disease it caused, to the seasonal flu. “It’s going to disappear. One day — it’s like a miracle — it will disappear. And from our shores, we — you know, it could get worse before it gets better. It could maybe go away. We’ll see what happens. Nobody really knows,” Trump said Feb. 28, with dozens of cases but no known fatalities in the U.S.

“VOTER FRAUD IS NOT A CONSPIRACY THEORY; IT IS A FACT!!!” — President Donald Trump, Dec. 24, 2020. When Trump lost the general election, he blamed voter fraud and sent his lawyers to court to try and reverse the results. In a free-wheeling news conference that lacked even a shred of evidence, his attorney, Rudy Giuliani, alleged everything from a “centralized” fraud scheme to election interference by foreign communists. Just a handful of fraud cases have been uncovered in key states: in Pennsylvania, three Republicans have been charged with illegally voting.

“This Russia thing with Trump and Russia is a made-up story,” Trump said May 11, 2018. From Day One, Trump has disputed what the U.S. intelligence community has concluded as a fact: Russia interfered in the 2016 U.S. election with the goal of boosting his bid while working to tear down his Democratic opponent, former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton.

“Republicans will always protect people with pre-existing conditions,” Trump said Oct. 20, 2018. Trump argued for years Republicans were defenders of people with pre-existing conditions, all the while his administration and several red states sued to overturn the Affordable Care Act, the Obama-era health care law that guaranteed those protections, without proposing a plan with comparable protections.

Some mental health professionals have publicly stated their view that Trump's behavior aligns with the criteria for narcissistic personality disorder, antisocial personality disorder, and paranoid personality disorder, according to the DSM-5.

Trump’s manifest grandiosity and disregard for facts, beginning with failure to accept clear evidence about the size of the crowd attending his inauguration, has put mental health professionals in the spotlight from Day One of his presidency.

Psychologists and commentators from all ideological camps early converged on a label of narcissistic personality disorder as the condition that “explains” Trump’s behavior. Among those making this assertion are more than 70,000 mental health professionals who signed a petition warning of Trump's potential dangerousness, despite longstanding professional injunctions against "diagnosing" public figures whom experts have not personally examined. President Donald Trump | Psychology Today

In the eyes of his supporters, Trump possesses extraordinary powers that are wielded for good and against evil. Who cares if he is flawed? So, what if he lacks certain distinctively human qualities? What does it matter that he is rude.

In a 2019 Fox News poll, 1 in 4 Americans reported that they believed “God wanted Donald Trump to become president.” Even in the first months of his administration, evangelical leaders began to see a higher purpose in the Trump presidency. In a public forum in 2017, the Christian televangelist James Robison told Trump: “You are, in fact, an answer to prayer. … I think you have been designed and gifted by God.” Jonathan Cahn, a charismatic New Jersey preacher and the author of best-selling prophetic books, likens Trump to Jehu, the Old Testament king who led ancient Israel away from idolatry. Cahn argues that Trump, like Jehu, is a “flawed vessel” who is being used by God for purposes that go well beyond Trump’s own comprehension.

As I stated earlier, when it comes to my religious beliefs, I'm willing to forego the Scientific Method as a guideline for proof and that's where Trump has found his "in" with millions of people. Through religion.

Donald Trump professes no religious faith. He knows almost nothing about Christianity or any other religion for that matter. He virtually never attends church. He has dedicated his professional life to amassing material wealth and burnishing his fame, bereft of any charitable instincts or sense of the transcendent. Demarcated by three marriages, his personal life reads like a sordid soap opera, filled with sexual scandal and multiple affairs. Nobody has ever mistaken Donald Trump for a choirboy or a righteous man of God.

Yet the man who is arguably the least religious president in American history continues to command supreme support from white evangelical Christians, 84% of whom voted for Trump in the 2020 election. They are his most devoted followers. To the delight of evangelicals, Trump appointed conservative judges who support religious freedom and oppose abortion, and he welcomed evangelical leaders to the table as president, paying them respect and soliciting their views. Trump also shares their worldview — up to a point. He agrees that we live in a fallen world, a dangerous and sinful world full of vicious people. “For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God,” evangelicals believe, quoting Romans 3:23. Trump gave expression to the same sentiment in a People magazine interview back in 1981: “Man is the most vicious of all animals, and life is a series of battles, ending in victory or defeat.” The Mass Psychology of Trumpism - New Lines Magazine

There you have it, partially. The brain wants what it wants, and truth can be suspended in the realm of religion and faith. To lump Trump supporters into one category such as CRAZY is too simple. There is so much more at play. But it's true, we gravitate to the familiar and reject what is unfamiliar. If this statement is true, then we should apply the Scientific Method to determine if Trump supporters are LIKE Trump. Is he FAMILIAR to them in his behavior? 

Data suggests our drive to select like-minded others may be far stronger than previously assumed. “We’re arguing that selecting similar others as relationship partners is extremely common — so common and so widespread on so many dimensions that it could be described as a psychological default,” according to Angela Bahns, assistant professor of psychology at Wellesley College. Researchers say the quest for similarity in friends could result in a lack of exposure to other ideas, values, and perspectives. Bahns noted the drive toward similarity presents the drawback of “limited exposure to different ideas and beliefs” along with rewards like “stability of identity, value systems, and ideology.” Her research shows not only do ‘birds of a feather flock together’ but goes one step further to show that ‘birds of a feather find each other before flocking. Study finds our desire for 'like-minded others' is hard-wired | KU News.

When it comes to what one believes as TRUTH several variables come into play. Mathew 6:21, "Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also." What a person treasures, they will accept facts which support it. Who WE are determine what we believe and what we accept as truth. 

We believe there is no one comparable to the audacious Donald Trump. WRONG. Facts support those who support his antics are like minded, like character, like morals, like minded, like hearted. 

This is not a fact many want to face. I ask you to apply the "Scientific Method" to this idea and see if the evidence will support my statement. If nothing else, it is good practice in objectively looking at facts about Donald Trump and his supporters. Like magnets, opposites repel each other.

DNA Biblical Before Scientific

Have you noticed it is harder and harder for people committing crimes such as murder to get away with it? Forensics have proven no matter how careful you are and how well planned a crime is, DNA is always left behind. A hair here, a partial fingerprint there, and if you sweat at the scene of the crime, that's DNA in which may lead to your apprehension. DNA analysis has become the go to in solving and catching criminals. The biological material used to determine a DNA profile include blood, semen, saliva, urine, feces, hair, teeth, bone, tissue, and cells. Which means wherever you go, you leave a piece of yourself behind in some way. As Clint Eastwood would say, "Do I feel lucky?’ Well, do ya, punk?”

In the beginning of using DNA to catch a criminal, the DNA left at the crime scene was the specific make-up of the criminal. NO TWO PEOPLE HAVE THE EXACT SAME DNA except twins. Identical twins, also called monozygotic (MZ) twins, share 100% of their genes, while fraternal twins, also called dizygotic (DZ) twins, share about 50% of their genes. Identical twins form when a single fertilized egg splits into two babies with the same DNA. 

The recovered DNA was an identifying source of the PERSON who was at the scene of the crime potentially being the one who committed the crime. But they had to match the DNA sample to the individual. Investigators had to have a SAMPLE already collected that would MATCH the sample they had collected from a crime. 

Police search available data banks to see if they have a DNA match. DNA databases are used to help identify the perpetrator. Crime scene evidence can also be linked to other crime scenes through the use of DNA databases.  For example, assume that a man was convicted of sexual assault.  At the time of his conviction, he was required to provide a sample of his DNA, and the resulting DNA profile was entered into a DNA database.  The federal government also collects DNA samples from persons convicted of offenses in certain categories, including crimes of violence or terrorism. 

The Mitochondrial DNA (mtDNA) Analysis Program is responsible for performing mtDNA analysis of forensic evidence containing SMALL or DEGRADED quantities of DNA on items of evidence submitted from federal, state, and local law enforcement agencies.  Mitochondrial DNA is a powerful tool available for investigating cases of kidnapping, missing persons, and skeletal remains where nuclear DNA is not present. Any sample left and collected at the scene of a crime can be used. The use of animal, plant, and microbial DNA to provide leads that may link DNA found on or near human perpetrators or victims to the actual perpetrator of the crime is also used.

The use of genealogical DNA samples does not need the actual perpetrator of the crime, but a relative sharing some of the criminal's DNA makeup. They find a relative with some of the criminal's DNA markers and TRACE the family member through his family tree narrowing down the criminal.

Police can't access the databases of direct-to-consumer DNA testing giants such as AncestryDNA and 23andMe without getting a court order from a judge first. Most turn instead to GEDmatch or FamilyTreeDNA — the two genealogy sites that don't require a warrant to access the data. Thierry Bernard, the CEO of GEDmatch’s parent company Qiagen, said in January 2023, about 70% of the GEDmatch database’s 1.8 million profiles are viewable to police. 

All of this ability to find criminals through DNA and Mitochondrial DNA (mtDNA) is an exciting breakthrough for scientists and forensic investigators to solve crimes, but it is nothing new to those who read and study the Bible. Within the pages of the Bible, it tells you the power of BLOOD.

 "...the voice of your brother's blood is crying to me from the ground" appears in Genesis 4:10-11. This was said by God to Cain when he killed his brother Able and tried to pretend, he didn't know what had happened to his brother.

Numbers 35:33 says, "So you shall not pollute and defile the land in which you live; for [the shedding of innocent] blood pollutes and defiles the land..."

Hebrews 4:13: "And no creature is HIDDEN from his sight, but all are naked and exposed to the eyes of him to whom we must give account..."

"But you must not eat meat that has its lifeblood still in it. And for your lifeblood I will surely demand an accounting. I will demand an ACCOUNTING from every ANIMAL. And from each MAN, too, I will demand an accounting for the life of his fellow man. Genesis 9:4-5.

Throughout the Bible the importance of BLOOD is clear and any blood shed, human or animal, the blood tells a story that must be accounted for to God.  Blood SPEAKS and anything the lifeblood touches also speaks such as skin. spit, and hair.

Criminals may have been able to get away with murders and other violent crimes from police, but NEVER from God. Humans have developed scientific methods enabling them to see and hear what the biologicals sample have to say pertaining to who the sample belongs to. But God was the originator of being able to understand ALL biological samples of man. God SOLVED all of the CRIMES and said he will have an accounting of why the blood was spilled.

Many Christians prefer to ONLY rely on the Bible and turn their nose up at science. There is no need to DISMISS science to prove faith in the Bible and God because science usually gives the Bible more proof of its intended meanings. One of my Seminary professors said, science is always catching up to the Bible.

So, if you are thinking of committing a crime, remember, innocent blood cries out. Do I feel lucky?’ Well, do ya, punk?”

 

Lust/Love and Social Media

Tina Turner had a song which asked, "What's love gotta do with it?"

You must understand, though the touch of your hand
Makes my pulse react
That it's only the thrill of boy meeting girl
Opposites attract

It's physical
Only logical
You must try to ignore that it means more than that

Oh-oh, what's love got to do, got to do with it?
What's love but a second-hand emotion?
What's love got to do, got to do with it?
Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken?

Seems like Tina was on to something. She tried to clue us in to the FACT that what a person is calling LOVE at first sight is no more than ATTRACTION and/or LUST. Dating people rarely make it to the true LOVE stage. Let's talk.

Even though many of us don’t want to admit it, good looks are the strongest factor influencing attraction. That’s according to Madeleine A. Fugère, Ph.D., a psychology professor at Eastern Connecticut State University and author of The Social Psychology of Attraction and Romantic Relationships. Cultural and family norms can have a big impact on the types of people we might choose to pursue or not pursue as potential romantic partners also.

Mating market preferences and decisions regarding attractiveness are arguably based on three core areas: appearances (aesthetics), personal characteristics and qualities (personality), and the ability to provide (resource) access and security to potential suitors.

Social media allows the modern man (and women) to be a hunter. Not a hunter of animals, but a hunter of women (men).

Hunting is viewed as status or competition among men and within their community. Hunting for men, more rarely for women, is fascinating and emotionally arousing with the parallel release of testosterone, serotonin, and endorphins, which can produce feelings of euphoria and alleviate pain. Dopamine is also a chemical released by the brain and is usually described as a “reward chemical”, whose evolutionary function is to give us an emotional hit when engaged in activities that are likely to improve our reproductive success such as hunting. For centuries, a man being a successful hunter elevated his status among the other men and increased his potential for mating with the females. 

According to a team of scientists led by Dr. Helen Fisher at Rutgers, romantic love can be broken down into three catagories: lust, attraction, and attachment. Each category is characterized by its own set of hormones stemming from the brain. Lust is driven by the desire for sexual gratification. The hypothalamus of the brain plays a big role in this, stimulating the production of the sex hormones, testosterone and estrogen, from the testes and ovaries. Testosterone increases libido in just about everyone. 

Attraction involves the brain pathways that control “reward” behavior, which partly explains why the first few weeks or months of a relationship can be so exhilarating and even all-consuming. This is that on cloud nine stage of dating.

Dopamine, produced by the hypothalamus, is a particularly well-publicized player in the brain’s reward pathway – it’s released when we do things that feel good to us. In this case, these things include spending time with loved ones and having sex. High levels of dopamine and a related hormone, norepinephrine, are released during attraction. These chemicals make us giddy, energetic, and euphoric, feelings even leading to decreased appetite and insomnia – which means you actually can be so “in love” that you can’t eat and can’t sleep. 

Many people in the dating scene ONLY want the lust and attraction stage of relationships. When the 'feel good' chemicals no longer give them their cloud nine feeling, they believe the love is gone when the relationship never entered the love stage. The lust and attraction hormones are the most powerful 'street' drugs making short-term relationship addicts out of the everyday person.

Brain scans of people 'in love' have actually shown that the primary “reward” centers of the brain, including the ventral tegmental area and the caudate nucleus, fire like crazy when people are shown a photo of someone they are intensely attracted to, compared to when they are shown someone they feel neutral towards (like an old high school acquaintance). The same brain regions light up when we become addicted to material goods as when we become emotionally dependent on our partners. And addicts going into withdrawal are not unlike love-struck people craving the company of someone they cannot see.

When looking at attachment oxytocin is often nicknamed the “cuddle hormone” for this reason. Like dopamine, oxytocin is produced by the hypothalamus and released in large quantities during sex. Cuddling can lead to attachment. Attatchment can lead to long-term relationships. [1] Men figured out a long time ago that cuddling after sex means you are in a relationship. Think back to people you were with sexually and whether or not they enjoyed cuddling with you. 

Social media is over stimulating attraction, lust, and the hunter-conqueror aspect of men with quick, easy access to beautiful women around the world of different ethnicities and cultures. I emphasize beautiful women because its scientific fact men are more sexually aroused by visual stimuli (photos), but women are more sexually aroused by concrete, auditory, olfactory, touch and emotionally relevant sexual stimulation. The internet is a crack dealer offering a wide selection of men and women to get HIGH on daily.

The mating game has always been a game about dipping into a healthy gene pool. Science continues to tell us men and women want to have a mate who is healthy.

Physical characteristics (e.g., narrow waist, long legs, and medium–large breasts) play an important role in determining attractiveness and selecting a potential mate for men. According to research, men prefer women with long, thick, and shiny hair. Turns out, they subconsciously consider this an indicator of good health, vital energy, and even a sign of fertility.

Studies have shown that pheromones reveal a variety of information about a person, including the one that relates to the health of their immune system. Therefore, men are able to determine women with the best immune system with the help of their smell. Wonder if that is why we wear so much perfume and cologne?

When we first look at a person, we are taking in more information than we realize. The symmetry of the face has a high importance in determining the attractiveness of women. It can even be calculated with the help of several tricks. Men pay attention to these criteria subconsciously because these facial features are a sign of good genes. Asymmetry, on the contrary, is associated with poor health, bad genes, and even abnormalities in the reproductive organs. The condition of women’s teeth plays a significant role for the representatives of the male gender. All because it gives an idea of its “residual reproductive value” regardless of age. I knew that you could check a horse's teeth to determine their age, but I never thought about humans doing it.

Studies have shown that men prefer thin female voices because they are perceived as younger and more womanish and show a high level of estrogen. Moreover, a high-pitched voice also assumes a smaller body size, while a low voice is usually more associated with masculinity, which means that women like men who have a deep voice. When hearing it, they subconsciously imagine a big and strong man.

Though women might be known for spending more time in front of the mirror, it’s actually men who are more judgemental when it comes to looks. According to a 2007 study performed in Germany, men placed far greater importance on the attractiveness of their mates than females. Remember, men are hunters and love to bag a trophy. He goes for the big game. 

And while women were still drawn to attractive men, they were more likely to consider dating less attractive individuals if they possessed other qualities they prized. Women choose handsome, tall men for short-term relationships but choose men with status for long-term relationships.

Women with higher BMIs (body mass index) or lower facial attractiveness were less selective in mate selection than their thinner, more attractive counterparts. Furthermore, these women became even less selective when there were more attractive females in the room.[2]  In this case, it was her attractiveness (not his) that influenced her selection. While looks are indeed important to women, they typically base their mate selection on more contextual factors. Surprising examples include the availability of competition and their estimates of their own attractiveness. You are right guys. You can never really know what a woman wants.

Women are not attracted directly to wealth and status, but to the behaviours indicating a man genuinely has wealth and status. 

Women are attracted to men with status and wealth. Women must be able to differentiate between the men who genuinely have wealth and social status, and those who are faking. One way to do this is by developing a heightened sense of social perception and recognizing what a successful man's behaviour looks like compared to the behaviour of an imitator. The behaviours become the primary source of attraction. 

This provides the explanation for why it seems like wealth, status, and height matter so much. If you were suddenly made better looking, a few inches taller, and inherited a billion dollars, would you behave the same way you do now? Of course not! You’d instantly be more confident, more relaxed, happier, less stressed out, and so on.

Women pick up on these behaviours, and it’s these behaviour patterns that are at the core of attraction, not the wealth and status itself. One study has shown that whether a man is considered attractive has more to do with the absence of bad qualities, rather than the presence of good qualities.

My next point I found as a surprise. The best looking thing on a man may be a good-looking woman. Women rate a man they see with an attractive woman as more desireable than an unattatched man. SURPRISE! Women probably assume partnered-up men must have those qualities of smarts and personality to be an appropriate match for a good-looking mate. 

Of course there are hundreds of studies that try to figure out how and why we are attracted to the people we are attracted to. Social media is filled with people giving relationship advice. No matter the findings by professionals and amatuers, no one has found the magic potion to get the person you want to want you back. Those dating in the dating world, with the help of social media, are offered a buffet full of selections. We know a person's appetite can be picky and ever changing. And if diners are like me, they eat their dessert first. 

Even with the ease of having a bigger pool to select a mate from, long-term relationships remain elusive. Drugs mess you up. Lust and attraction are 'drug' induced feelings. Addiction to the feel good feelings can make you a serial dater. "Love" addicts fall in and out of love and wonder why they can not find the 'one.' The truth is the 'one' will be boring after the lust and attraction drugs die down or when you build up a tolerence to them. The person then has to decide once the butterflies and fireworks die down, do they still want to be with the person. Most people move on to the next bigger better high. I say it again, social media is a drug dealer.

So, you get no dating advice from me. I will just say good luck and good hunting.

Tips given to make a person more attractive.

1.    Women smile more. Smiling makes women look friendly and “sexually receptive.” The same doesn’t hold true for men. People typically associate expressions of happiness with femininity.

2.    Women, wear the color red. This red-attractiveness link is partially explained by men’s perceptions of implied sexual receptivity among women wearing reddish garb. Studies have shown women tend to wear red and pink when they are biologically more sexually receptive, like during ovulation. Can anyone say Barbie? If you want attention from the ladies, a man's best bet is to stick to red, purple, black, blue, or white (but only white if it's in the form of a plain white t-shirt with jeans). 

3.    Don't play hard to get. Recent studies suggest that people are more likely to rate others as attractive if they can easily understand the emotions they’re displaying. 

4.    A higher-pitched voice in women is more attractive to men—and vice versa, a lower-pitched voice in men is more attractive to women. 

5.    A sense of humor in a man has been scientifically proven to draw the attention of women. Men also find women who laugh at their humor attractive.

6.    Be kind. The ‘halo effect’ suggests that those who are perceived as physically attractive are also perceived as having socially favorable personality traits like kindness.

7.    The most attractive physical features fall under ‘self-care’—things like good grooming, clean hair, nice fitting and quality clothing, good posture, and healthy weight. We are more likely to search out a partner who is healthy and strong (which mean good genes), as well as capable of taking care of future offspring, which is evidenced by how they take care of themselves. 

8.    Don't stress. Women seem to be able to detect the men who have the strongest immune response and they seem to find them the most attractive. The researchers suspect that testosterone, which is linked with a strong immune system and low cortisol, also plays a role in attracting women.

9.    Faces with natural makeup were seen favorably but faces with more dramatic makeup were seen as less trustworthy. On social media, men seem to DM women with great bodies and makeup skills, but they don't trust them. Men should grow facial hair, especially a beard because it makes him seem more masculine.

Excerpts taken from my manuscript, Manhood Interrupted Please like, share, comment, and follow. Thank you   

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[1] Wu, Katherine, Love, Actually: The science behind lust, attraction, and companionship, 02/17/2017. www.Love, Actually: The science behind lust, attraction, and companionship - Science in the News (harvard.edu).