What Makes Me Angry and Sin-g?

The Sound of Music has a famous song "These are a few of my favorite things" and it is such a cheery song filled with cute little things. I bet you're humming it right now. How sweet.

In the movie a family's newfound happiness is interrupted by Hitler and his need for dominance through war. 

Country music is often the brunt of jokes because the man is always left by his woman or dog. People are waiting for the country song where the self-driving car leaves the poor old cowboy. On the other hand, any and everything can happen to you in Blues songs without anyone making fun of you. Elton John said, I Guess That's Why They Call Them the Blues and we all nod with understanding.

If I was able to make a list of things that upset me, it would be something like this and I don't think there is a song for them yet, or maybe...:

 1. Fake News: There is no spin because it is all mean, divisive, brainwashing, calculated fabrication and twisting of words and deeds. But do I watch it regularly? You bet. It is like a car wreck; I just can't believe the destruction and injury right in front of me. You stare in awe and shock unable to process the carnage. It is shocking and sad at the same time. SONG: Tell Me lies tell me sweet little lies by Fleetwood Mac

I watch because I also want to know what dangerous people are thinking and talking about. When the media can rouse people to do violent things that is mind control and manipulation for a bad motive. What happened to people being decent just because? Fake News has a right to exist, and I have the right to disagree with their opinions on current events. Even stating you dislike their cable broadcasts opens a person up for brutal attacks by its faithful viewers. Fake News is a money-making machine and there is no water too deep for them to wade into for a dollar. SONG: For the Love of Money by The O'Jays

 2. RACISM: I believe racism should have been classified as a mental illness by now. It is a state of living that hurts/hinders happy living for the sufferer and those around them. The racist does not believe their life is affected by racist ideology and that's how mental illness works. The sufferer cannot realize the affects the illness is having on their own lives. Violent crimes including murder has been executed by people with an aversion or out and out hate for a person because of the color of their skin. Once the violence is executed upon the person of color it is called a hate crime, but mental health intervention should have occurred beforehand. Family knew racism was skewing their family member's thoughts to the point of potential violence, but believed it was "normal" hate with no possible consequences. Racists normalize hate. Isn't that ABNORMAL? SONG: Black or White by Michael Jackson

 3. SEXISM: As a Christian woman, it has become apparent that any defense that I present in regard to women and religion is called Feminist Theology. Labeling a woman as a feminist if she declares a right to an occupation, she is qualified for deemed/claimed solely for men by men and want equal pay for said occupation is supposed to be an insult. There is no such word for men when they choose an occupation, they believe they are qualified to have. Women do not have a woman ONLY occupation. SONG: I'm A Woman by Peggy Lee

Take some of this: I am a perfectly formed woman that God (not Satan) gave a functioning brain that enjoys the Bible, Salvation, etc., and I am not afraid to open my mouth and witness, preach, teach, counsel, anyone in need. That is that and I don't care how you label it. To be a Christian requires ACTION and oh, boy am I active!!!! SONG: Eye of the Tiger by Survivor

 4. MENTAL HEALTH: We continue to live in an era where the majority of those incarcerated in prison have mental health issues that we have not yet learned how to address. We have a growing homeless population also suffering from mental health issues and we can't decide what to do with them either. I understand mental illness is a difficult illness to manage and can be costly. There is not a quick fix, but the stance of ignoring it does not work. If there can be education and intervention early in growth and development of people maybe there can be better outcomes. SONG: Everybody Hurts by REM

We do physical exams on children monitoring their growth and development. Maybe there should be mental health physicals yearly as well for children or at doctor appointments for those with a family history of mental health issues and readily available resources to intervene with little or no cost. SONG: The Greatest Love of All by Whitney Houston

We ARE doing better at taking the stigma out of having mental health issues, but the statistics prove there are many suffering mentally and are more than likely falling through the gap. SONG: One by Three Dog Night

5. MY OLD SELF: I have spent a lot of years somehow focused on doing what was right and expected of me and not doing a thing that I wanted to do. Move over world. I am going for the absolutely crazy things that I want to do and you don't have to like it, agree with it, or approve it. Get all of the labels out and dust them off. I am on a mission to be ME and enjoy it. Look out for me doing the one thing I really love, speaking up and out about WOMEN. SONG: I Am Woman by Helen Reddy

I have found myself in many male dominated fields of employment (military/Seminary). At many times there was conflict with me being there. Because I clashed it was easy to think the problem was me and I may have had a problem with authority figures because I was always under the instruction of men. Then it was easy to believe I was in a place I should not be if it's such a daily struggle. Now I have written a book about manhood throughout history and I am being told I can't have such a book because I am a woman. SONG: Happy by Pharrell Williams

6.  GIVING UP: We are all on our own individual journey and we are to live it out. Opposition is always the partner of great things. We see success and believe it happened overnight when there has been years of struggle and rejection and many who did not have the opportunity to see their work flourish, but they gave it their all. SONG: Don't Stop Me Now by Queen

We shouldn't give up on politics when our party doesn't win and we shouldn't become so loyal to a particular party until it hurts our Democracy. We should continue to not tolerate racism and sexism and protect each individual's right to exist. We should continue to learn mental health matters and its just another part of being healthy. Mental illness is not a shortcoming or flaw or something to not acknowledge. It is just another illness or health issue to address as one of the many illnesses the human body may have to confront in life. We all should strive to live our most authentic lives living into our gifts and talents enriching our own lives and the lives of others. SONG: What A Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong 

The things that make you mad should make you better. Two wrongs never make a right. I have witnessed women who feel mistreated by men become women who strongly dislike men and vice versa. This does not make the woman or man better, just bitter. How can one show up in the world in a healthy way being bitter? The Bible says in Ephesians 4:26 "Be angry, yet do not sin." Wise words to live by. I say be angry and sin-g. SONG: What the World Needs Now by Dionne Warwick 

So I ask you, WHAT MAKES YOU ANGRY and is there a song for that?    

Comfort Zones

 

     While working as a mistress of ceremonies for our state's Congressman Benny Thompson, I had set up two tables for the other people on the program that would be speaking. As time neared for the event to start, the speakers began to take their seats on stage. We all knew each other from participating in various organizations within the community together.

    As the audience took their seats, I began to notice something strange; all of the men sat at one table and all of the women sat at another table. After reflecting on how the night went (successfully), I thought about why the men sat together and not one sat at the table with the women. There were 6 chairs at each table. The men would take a chair from the women's tables adding an extra chair to their tables unwilling to sit at the table with women. I mean the husbands even separated from their wives.  If I knew this was going to happen, I would have assigned seats.

    There was nothing wrong with the sexes dividing in such a way, but it is odd how people will group into groups of familiarity, common interest, and likeness. At our local county school, it never fails that at events for the children; the white people sit on one side of the gym and the black people sit on the other side of the gym. Don't get me wrong. Our community is comprised of nice friendly white and black people that greet each other with smiles and how are you. We all know each other in a generational way. We know grandmothers and grandfathers who have passed away and so forth down the line. In our rural country churches, it is not odd to see the men sitting on one side of the church and the women and children sitting on the opposite side of the church.

    I am a northerner by birth and my husband is a southerner by birth. When we first married, we would go and visit his elderly parents. He and his dad would be in one room and his mother, and I would somehow end up in another room. This was foreign to me. I didn't understand why were in separate rooms. I voiced to him that WE were visiting his parents and I did not understand the separating of the sexes even in the home environment. So, needless to say, WE became accustomed to us all visiting in the SAME room due to my insistence with my husband. His parents didn't mind the new arrangement so I couldn't understand why it was implemented in the first place.  

    What is it about this unconscious gravitation to the familiar - to the more likeness that we seem to do? If we have some built in tendency to surround ourselves with the familiar or sameness of ourselves, how are we ever to experience diversity?

    When I went to the school programs I purposefully sat on the white side. I looked like a black dot in a sea of white and yes, I got stares from both the black people and the white people. In essence I chose to be an outcast. When I went to church, I sat next to my husband. We stuck out like an odd couple and people thought my husband was hen pecked and that's why I sat next to him (Why couldn't I have been the one rooster pecked?). Once again, I got stares and the pastor scowled at me. Once again, I was in the role of outcast.

    Why was I willing to go through the gauntlet of stares, the whispers behind my back, and being labeled as antisocial by the women and black people? Because I was a living breathing walking example for my children, and I wanted them to learn something different.

    The familiar or what makes us comfortable is not necessarily the best for us. We will never grow or find out different views or new ideas if we constantly surround ourselves with people like ourselves who share our every view. 

    In Christianity I have wrestled with the idea of Christians just surrounding themselves with other Christians. This is good of course for learning the Bible, for support and edification, and to bond in the body of Christ. But you can also run the risk of becoming irrelevant in this comfort zone. In a circle of like Christians, who is there to evangelize to the non-Christian? Who is there for you to be the light and salt of the earth for? How can you understand the needs of the unsaved if you are always around the saved?

     I had a professor in Seminary who was a pastor and home schooled his children. He said someone was going to indoctrinate his kids so it might as well be him. The kid's exposure to the evils of the world was only relayed by his word of mouth because their lives were shielded at every avenue- books, television, internet, friends, relatives, and extracurricular activities, were strictly monitored and reviewed by him. When you saw them, they were all mini copies of him seeking his approval with their every action.

    I often wondered what type of evangelist his children would eventually be. Academic wise they will be able to answer any Bible related question, but they will never be able to empathize with life experiences of the unsaved. Were they being rendered ineffective as evangelists by their controlled environment?    How wonderful my life would be with others just like me. I'm so precious. We all know that would not be a wonderful life. When I was a teen, I believed in some things whole heartedly only to grow older or be exposed to new things to discover what I had believed in unto death at that time was incorrect. This pattern of me discovering some beliefs I held not being absolute would continue. As I journeyed through life I deleted, redefined, changed, or retained beliefs as I entered my 30's, 40's, 50's, and I am sure this will go on and on as long as I live. Fingers crossed.

    Being with someone just like me is stagnation. COMFORT ZONES. Is being with LIKE people only really the best we can do for ourselves? Should it be the best we offer ourselves? What happens when we get out of our comfort zone of likeness? I have a rainbow of associates and I have learned something from each and every one of them. I can honestly say that a friendship that I had with a lesbian fellow soldier formed me into a better mother. Seeing the struggle of this young lady as she denied, faced, accepted, and then embraced her sexual orientation at the loss of her mother's love (oh, yeah, she was an only child so the stakes were high for her) made me realize that individual happiness belongs to everyone, and she could not and should not live a life to make me happy or anyone else happy or comfortable. Her different unfamiliar life enriched me as a person and when we reconnected after serving in the Army together, I made sure to tell her how her life experiences I witnessed expanded my thoughts and opinions so I could expand my daughters' access to information through me as I raised them.

    Her soul and judgement would be between her and God. I would not be there for her judgement or have any input. We all would meet our maker alone. So, I learned that my kids were given their lives and they alone would live it. What I may consider easy choices in life for me may not be an easy choice for another. I can disagree with someone without disagreeing with their existence on earth or right to live as they choose. God does not even do that, or He would have a lot to say about all of our choices we make daily in our lives. We are given the opportunity of free will.    

    COMFORT ZONES are in place for the protection of our vulnerable parts. We are uncomfortable with the 'different' 'unfamiliar.' We have social comfort zones without even knowing it. Everyone wants to have comfort. But every once in a while, we should challenge ourselves to step out of them knowing that differences are just that. They are not contagions built to destroy. They are differences that God wanted and intended to make each of us unique for his kingdom's function and purpose. Maybe there are differences just to see how we act and react to them. Maybe differences are about US and who we are and how we treat each other. There is value in each of us in our differentness. Sometimes differences just boil down to a choice between LOVE and HATE.

Let's take time to actually appreciate those differences God created in each of us. Let's celebrate those differences and learn the good things from each. When we do group off into those comfort groups and

look across that aisle, let's remember that there is a likeness, a comfortable sameness in all of us and that is THE IMAGE OF GOD. 

    We all were created with the freedom of thought, and it is our right. We as humans all have a need for food, shelter, safety, happiness, health, and love. We are all shaped by the environment we live in and the people surrounding us but how we became who we are is not etched in stone, we have the compacity for change. Living and experiencing life means experiencing people also. It takes energy and focus of thought to block out the DIFFERENT each time we encounter it. So, when I say we all are more alike I must include we all have fear and sometimes that fear shows up in the way we experience, react, and treat what we deem as 'different' 'unfamiliar.'

    Today I encourage you to every once in a while to step out of your comfort zone. Don't worry, it will be there for you to return to. Be a growing person at all times by experiencing the NEW different people and circumstances and what it/they can bring to your life. Don't be the same person in your 30's, 40's, 50's, and beyond. I am not asking you to GIVE UP your values, morals, and comfortability of your chosen group, but to be aware it/they may not be the absolute for everyone else in the world, and that is okay. The 'different' or 'unfamiliar' does not have to be erased and have a scarlet letter placed on their chest. They are allowed to be different without being WRONG.