Are You Considered Ugly If You Are Over 50?

DO YOU LIKE YOUR AGE? ARE YOU FRIENDS WITH YOUR AGE?

The general consensus is that the age of 50 is more like the new 30. But we know it is the people 50+ making this statement and not those who are under the age of 50. So, the younger people laugh and say of course an old person is going to claim they are not old. But 50 is 50 no matter how you slice it right? Is it true 50+ year olds want to be 30 somethings?

On average, 69% of women aged 45–60 reported feeling at least six years younger than their chronological age. Women in their fifties still feel sexy, vibrant, beautiful and desirable. And the truth being told, women 50 and over, look fantastic if they have taken care of themselves throughout their lives. They are still dating, a part of the fashion scene, and active socially. That's why culture has added the word MILF.

The American Academy of Facial Plastic and Recon­structive Surgery (AAFPRS) conducted a survey of ap­proximately 500 women between the ages of 45–60 to find out what they think about the changing face of 50. The general consensus is that 50 is more like the new 30. 

Now, more and more men and women are not happy with just looking 10 years younger, mostly because they feel closer to 20 years younger. This is especially true in South Florida, where image and youth are very much looked at. People are invested in LOOKING younger because they are LIVING longer. In the past, they didn't care how they looked 50 and beyond because death was knocking at their door. That is no longer true. Today, for those 50 and over, looking younger isn't an attempt to be "in" with the 30 somethings with all of their problems the older person has already overcome. We don't WANT to be you. Been there done that.

Despite wars, economic upheaval, and climate change, global life expectancy has increased markedly over the past 70 years, from 45.7 years in 1950 to 72.6 in 2019; even with the drop caused by COVID-19, we are still outliving our parents and grandparents by a significant margin. Today, living into the 90s or even the 100s is more likely than ever before, particularly with a commitment to making healthy life choices, to say nothing of large-scale improvements in healthcare, sustainability and infrastructure that also increase longevity at the societal level.

All this added longevity necessitates a review of our career and health habits. Back in the day, people worked for 25-35 years, usually until they were in their late 50s. The average age of retirement in the United States was 59 in 1991; you would then expect maybe 10 more good years, 15 if you were lucky. By 2022, that average age had gone up to 66 — and now, people are living 20 to 30 years longer than that.

A 50-year-old who works out regularly and with high intensity intervals can be just as fit as someone three decades younger, according to a study in Medicine & Science in Sports & Exercise. There is no magic the young have to looking good. They are not favored by the gods over the 50+ year olds. Granted, a 50-year-old will never look like a 20-year-old, but youth does not have the market on what is attractive and seen as beautiful and healthy. Young men and women are using all available resources they can find to also look their best. Cosmetic aisles and medical offices are not solely littered by desperate older people looking for the fountain of youth. All AGES look for ways to look and feel their best.

To physically look less than 50 a person can smooth out their forehead. Unless you have bangs, there is no easy way to conceal forehead wrinkles. And as one of the biggest signs of aging skin, a wrinkled forehead is one of the first things you will want to have fixed. Luckily, with non-invasive injectables like Botox, you can temporarily relax the muscles in your forehead, and smooth out your wrinkles in no time at all. ALL AGES USE BOTOX.

Getting rid of a double chin can be helpful to look younger. As you age, you start to gain fat in places of your body that you never dreamed of when you were in your twenties, including your chin. If you have started to develop a double chin and can’t seem to get rid of it with diet and exercise, Dr. Fiona Wright can help. By using non-invasive procedures like VelaCONTOUR, Dr. Wright can shrink the fat cells in your chin and give you back a more taut appearance.

Hollowed skin shows age and should go. It’s rare that you see an elderly individual with smooth, full skin. Once you hit your fifties, you may notice volume and collagen loss in your cheeks and across your face. Luckily, by using fillers like Restylane and Juvederm, Dr. Fiona Wright can plump up your face and give you back the glow you had in your twenties. On Tic Tok there are tweens showing you their facial cleansing and moisturizing regimen. Ageless beauty seems to take work and is not a punishment for aging.

Let’s face it: nobody wants to look their age. The young person can't wait to be an adult, older, and older people want to maintain their looks while enjoying the fruits of having aged.

One positive attribute of being 50 and beyond obtained and which does not want to be relinquished is age lends a sense of urgency to doing things you’ve put off and finishing things you’ve started. It also makes you deeply grateful for the fact that you’re still here. As a million memes attest to, ageing is a gift not everyone gets to enjoy.

The utter joy of not caring about stuff is one of the most thrilling developments of life many 50 and older relish. They still care about important things, but the small stuff seems to roll off of their backs more easily. 50's gives such joy to realize that it ALL doesn’t matter, and to let it go.

Once those 50+ realize and accept that the first flourish of youth and beauty has gone – that actually, it’s quite hard work keeping up with that too. Knowing that a FIRST flourish means there can be a SECOND flourish. Yes, beauty isn't a one-time fleeting occurrence. Wisdom, from living, teaches there is beauty in every stage in life in many different THINGS and WAYS. Personal, physical beauty is such a small part of living a full life. It seems 50+ can lend itself to having a beautiful MIND.

An aged person begins to know what suits them and stop worrying about it and focus more on what works for them. There’s a huge sense of relief in not being part of that rat race and to largely stop worrying about what other people think about you, and you find yourself doing what the hell you like. 

Hopefully as a person ages, reaching that half-a-century age, they become happier in their own skin, even if it’s not as pert as it used to be, and laugh more easily. With joy they have become better company; kinder, softer. That they let that hard, combative edge that used to make them challenging to spend time with, blunted, and they are a better person for it. Along with being kinder, hopefully also, comes the wisdom and the grace to say no to things more often – which is an act of being kind to oneself. 50+ can become a time of no longer doing crap that you’re supposed to like but secretly hate. Freedom is a beautiful thing in its own right. 

No one has to pity the 30-year-olds or those 50+.  Those 50 and beyond can remember life when it was so much harder at that age, having to fumble your way through life, trying to be a parent and career woman/man and trying to strap on a social life, and pretend to have it all when inside, you’re actually bewildered and exhausted. Those under 50 cannot even begin to want or desire a time when the workplace is saying they are no longer valued or needed, and the doctor is prescribing a new medication at each office visit for a new health concern. When the body crackles and aches with each move and there are lines on the face announcing your long journey of life.

For me, your age is just that, YOUR age. It has been filled with a life only you can live. The way you look at the time of your AGE has nothing to do with the soul, spirit, personality inhabiting the aged body. We need to think about the present that is wrapped under the tree on Christmas day. For a second, the recipient of the gift may exclaim how pretty the present is wrapped but then in a violent frenzy (most of the time) they tear off the wrapping with much anticipation to discover what is inside. Even the most horribly wrapped gift with the ugliest wrapping paper will never be declined to be opened.

Be the present that you are and hopefully, with an ounce of grace, the least thing a person will say about you in gratitude is, "IT WAS THE THOUGHT THAT COUNTED."

Solar Eclipse Fear 2024

The time has come for the solar eclipse of 2024 and people are planning to watch it by the thousands, even millions. Once, eclipses were feared, but now they are a don't miss event. No longer is it an occurance to be feared, but deep within people still have their suspicions about the meaning of solar eclipses. Are you a person who believes there is no significance or meaning to solar eclipses or are you among the many who think there may be something going on regarding these events?

There is a belief the body can be affected by the soloar eclipse because stars, planets and vibrations form part of our daily existence. We receive light from the sun. We are governed by the gravitational force of the moon, controlling our emotions, high tides and low tides within us.It is believed the astrological significance of the solar eclipse; humans and all living organisms will experience the following effects: “Sleep disorders, nightmares, bad dreams, lack of sleep, a draining energy when waking up the next morning. Accidents, near mishaps, carelessness, loss of memory, low concentration levels, feeling anxious, feeling exhausted, and hollow feelings in the sacral chakra. There could be weird visions both in real time and in dreams.

CONFESSION. I am a believer that we are not separate and we are affected by heavenly activities of the stars and planets. Not too much into the energy thing, but I know the moon affects peaople. Ask hospital staff what happens in the ER during a full moon.

During the solar eclipse of 1842, 20,000 people of all social classes gathered in Perpignan, France, and applauded the sun’s performance. For the 2024 solar eclipse, the sum estimate from this analysis is that between 1.85 and 7.4 million people will visit the path of totality on eclipse day.

Beyond its astronomical wonder, the total solar eclipse holds spiritual significance for many. According to Architectural Digest, it symbolizes a time of darkness and spiritual renewal, offering an opportunity for introspection and the shedding of old energies.Throughout history, solar eclipses have had profound impact on adherents of various religions around the world. They were viewed as a message from God or spiritual forces, inducing emotions ranging from dread to wonder. Some Christians have believed that an eclipse portends the coming of the "end times" that will precede Christ's return to Earth as prophesized at various points in the Bible.

In the Tibetan Buddhist tradition, it is believed that the energy of positive and negative actions is multiplied during major astronomical events such as a solar eclipse.

Hindus generally regard a solar or lunar eclipse as a bad omen. Some observe fasts before and many do not eat during the period of the eclipse. Observant Hindus ritually bathe to cleanse themselves during the first and final phases of an eclipse. Some also offer prayers to ancestors. Most temples are closed for the duration of the eclipse. Devotees gather for prayers along pilgrimage sites near holy rivers during the onset of an eclipse. The event is considered to be a good time for prayer, meditation and chanting of mantras — all believed to ward off evil.

In Islam, a solar eclipse is a time to turn to God and pray. The eclipse prayer is based on narrations of sayings and actions of Prophet Muhammad.

The Talmud — the collection of writings compiled more than 1,500 years ago that constitute Jewish religious law — offers specific blessings for many natural phenomena, but not for eclipses. Instead, it depicts an eclipse as “an ill omen for the world.

It is no surprise that love/romance is a part of the mythology surrounding eclipses. Usually, in mythology, the woman is the moon, but when it comes to eclipses, the woman is the sun. 

In the Euahlayi oral tradition of southeast Australia, the Sun is known as a woman named Yhi and the moon as a man called Bahloo. Yhi falls in love with Bahloo and chases him across the sky. Yhi tells the spirits that hold up the sky that if they let Bahloo escape she will plunge the world into darkness (a total solar eclipse). A medicine man would recite magical chants to combat this evil omen.

In German mythology, the hot female Sun and the cold male moon are married. The Sun rules the day, and the sleepy moon rules the night. Seeking companionship, the moon is drawn to his bride and they come together to create a solar eclipse.

In Tahitian myth, The Sun and moon are lovers who join up (the eclipse) but get lost in the moment and create stars to light their return to normalcy.

The Inuit tell of the Sun goddess Malina, who is chased across the sky by her brother, the moon god Igaluk. Occassionally he catches up with her for a brief reunion and everything goes dark.

Fear has been a long-time companion of eclipses. The sun, which is vital to life is being messed with or acting strange and that caused great concerned for people who did not understand what was occuring. Even today, people believe it must be some kind of sign, and we are just not aware of what is happening.

The Chippewa people, who were one of the largest groups of American Indians in North America, shot flaming arrows at the sun in hopes of rekindling it. There were tribes in Peru who dis the same but for a different reason. They were attempting to fight off the beast that was trying to destroy the sun.

The Japanese believed that during the eclipse, poison would drop from the sky, so they covered their walls to protect themselves. And if you happened to be in Transylvania, the belief was that the eclipse would cause a plague.

In ancient Mesopotamia, a solar eclipse was a cause for deep concern. The ancient peoples of the Near East feared that eclipses, especially of the sun and moon, but also of the planets, were an “evil portent” that signaled great danger for the health and life of the king. To save the ruler from a dire fate, they would appoint a temporary king for a brief period and murder him, thus fulfilling the portent of the king’s death and allowing the usual occupant of the throne to return to office unharmed.

Many cultures imagined a solar eclipse occurred when a mythological being ate the sun. In Vietnam, it was a frog. In the Andes, a puma. Among the native peoples of North America, animals from squirrels to bears did the job. In ancient China, a dragon was responsible. In other cultures, eclipse myths revolved around a meeting or marriage between the sun and the moon.

Chinese astronomers compiled records of solar eclipses, but they saw them as dark omens for the emperor, who had to avoid meat and perform rites to “rescue” the sun.

During the eclipse in 1995 when soldiers in Cambodia aimed their guns toward the sun and fired in the hopes of scaring away the mythic dragon from the sky. It was reported that the only casualties were from the bullets.

At one point, it was believed that the eclipse could cause pregnancy issues, including blindness, cleft lips and birthmarks. Some of those superstitions continue today, and sometimes pregnant women are warned to stay inside, not eat and not carry sharp objects.

In some cultures, especially Hispanic communities, there is a belief that babies could be born with facial defects due to a change in the atmosphere. The superstition is that pregnant women should stay inside and take precautions because the sun's magnetic feild could suck or eat away the lip area of the fetus.

Pregnant women are told to wear red undergarments or red ribbons and place safety pins, or some type of metal on their bellies to protect themselves. In some cultures, pregnant women are told to lie flat on the floor and not move during the eclipse, or keep something metallic, like scissors, underneath a pillow or bed. Some cultures also believed that children born during an eclipse would turn into mice. Persian people believe if a pregnant woman touches her face during an eclipse the baby will come out with a birthmark.

A common belief is that a solar eclipse can indicate bad health if you birthday is six months before or six months after the solar event. One myth is that solar rays will poison food thats prepared during an eclipse. In India, some cultures opt to fast during an eclipse. This is done because it is believed that any food prepared during an eclipse is impure, or worse, poisonous.

Italians have long believed that if flowers are planted during an eclipse, they will be more colorful when it’s time to bloom.

The Batammaliba of Togo and Benin believe an eclipse happens because the Sun and Moon are fighting one another. In order to get the Sun back, people on Earth are advised to settle their differences and make peace.

Enjoy the solar eclipse of 2024 with freedom from fear of calamity. But, be open to changes within yourself during this time. All things happen for a reason. Nothing is random. Everything and everyone has meaning. Don't rack your brain trying to find the significance to this event, but don't be like those the Bible speak about. Mark 8:8: "Do you have eyes but fail to see, and ears but fail to hear? And don’t you remember?" "So we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are unseen; for things which are visable are temporal, (just brief and fleeting), but things whaich are invisible are evelasting and imperishable", 2 Corinthians 4:18. 

Sacrifice of Motherhood

Ask a woman who has been pregnant and givien birth to describe the experience and you will receive varying accounts. Some women enjoy and have the 'glow' of pregnacy while others find it a time filled with nausea and physical discomfort. A 2015 study by Polish researchers found mothers carrying sons had higher disgust sensitivity compared to mothers carrying daughters in the first trimester. While girl-moms’ queasiness decreased during the second trimester, boy-moms actually experienced elevated stomach-turning reactions.

Deliveries can be quick or drawn out with intense pain. There are those who want to be present and experience every nuance of giving birth, while others pray to be knocked out and awakened once the baby is delivered. Joanna was forced to remain in the tilted position 24 hours a day for two and a half months. After 75 days – and what is believed to be the longest labour ever recorded – Joanna gave birth to a healthy girl, Iga, and boy, Ignacy. The two babies were delivered by caesarean at a neo-natal clinic in Wroclaw, Poland.

Even with medical books available to walk a woman through pregnancy and delivery, there is always something the literature is unable to convey and could only be learned through the experience of BEING pregnant and GIVING birth. 

It surprises me how many people view being pregnant and giving birth as no more extrodinary or involved as going to the grocery store for food. They say it has been done for years, so there must not be that much to it. Many of the adverse effects of pragnancy women faced were turned into just old wive's tales. The old wives were on to something when they warned “gain a child and lose a tooth.” Women who have had three children forfeit four chompers more than those who have had two kids or fewer. Women whose first two children are the same sex, and who then go on to have a third child, are particularly at risk. Problems with gum disease and calcium absorption in pregnancy may leave moms vulnerable 

Carrying a child and giving birth, whether vaginally or by cesarean section, can stress muscles, ligaments, and nerves responsible for sexual function and bladder and bowel control. The U.S. has one of the highest maternal mortality rates among developed countries, according to data from the Orginisation for Economic Cooperation and Development. There were 20 maternal deaths for every 100,000 live births in 2019, more than double the rate just two decades ago.

More than half of the women, 52%, died after delivery. The total numbers are likely higher thab reported, as deaths from suicide and drug overdoses among people who recently gave birth may not be listed as postpartum deaths. Black women are more than twice as likely to die as a result of chilkdbirth than White women, underscoring racial and ethnic diparities.

The most common complications women report after giving birth include pain after sex, incontinence, pain at the incision site following a cesarean section, and postpartum depression, Gunter said. Once the baby is born, a woman’s blood pressure may spike dangerously. She may hemorrhage or develop egg-sized blood clots. Her emotions may plummet or soar amid rapidly fluctuating hormones. Crippling lower back pain may sear on one side of the body, while on the other, the abdominal muscles separate after months of straining to contain a growing human. These changes happen while her newborn baby needs to eat once every two to three hours, if not more frequently.

In a first-of-its-kind, ground-breaking analysis of pre- and post-pregnancy brain scans published in 2016, researchers found mothers lose gray matter during pregnancy—and these losses endure for at least two years. 

Even with all we know about pregnany and childbirth, there are surprises. Because being pregnant and delivering a baby is much more demanding on the body, serious thought should be given whether to bnecome a mother or not and the choice should be made by the person affected the most - the potencial mother. Motherhood is a sacrificial act filled with mystery and can even be seen in the animal kingdom. Moms do and give in ways not even noticed by themselves.

One similarities moms have with an animal is how they carry their newborn. Regardless of whether they are left- or right-handed, human moms tend to cradle their babies on the left side of their bodies, especially in the early months. Observed off the coast of a Russian island, walrus moms tend to keep their babies on the left while bobbing along the waves, and their calves swam over to their mother’s left side before diving to suckle. 

We all know mother protect their children fiercely The widespread phenomenon of maternal aggression may involve oxytocin, a neurochemical also related to birth and lactation. In a 2017 lab experiment, rat moms stopped attacking a threat once oxytocin signaling in part of their brains was blocked. Some studies have found that oxytocin levels in moms increase at the onset of labor and during labor compared to 1 or 2 weeks before labor, reaching a peak just when the head of the baby is delivered. In another study, levels of oxytocin were found to increase slowly until delivery and then decrease up to 8 weeks postpartum. One group reported higher levels of oxytocin at 36 weeks of pregnancy than 1 day after delivery or later.

Mothers are willing to go to the death for their children. Here are some animals who go above and beyond for their offsprings. I ask you to picture a 'human' mom and the sacrifice she makes with her decision to become a mom. Motherhood (pregnancy and delivery included) is not for the faint of heart.

Ever the overachiever, the female octopus can lay up to hundreds of thousands of eggs in one go. Over the eggs’ development period — anywhere from 40 days to 53 months in the case of one record-breaking species, Graneledone boreopacifica, these maternal cephalopods gently blow water currents over the eggs to provide them with oxygen and keep them clean. Unwilling to leave her brood to hunt for food, the mother octopus often resorts to eating one or two of her own tentacles for sustenance while waiting for them to hatch.

Chicken moms take their duties very seriously. Creating an endless amount of calcium carbonate for eggshells is a difficult task, so if chickens don't get enough calcium in their diets, they'll actually dissolve their own bones to make baby-housing shells. 

Like bears, the mother Pacific gray whales go hungry for months while still needing to produce high-calorie milk for their babies. During this time they may lose as much as 8 tons of weight.

For many females spiders, they attach their egg cocoons to their webs and watch over them until the babies hatch. Once her children have hatched, the mother continues to eat, but regurgitates most of her meals as a nutrient soup for her offspring while the spiderlings stay in their mother's web. When the babies are around a month old, the mother spider rollover on her back allowing the spiderlings to clamber over her, kill her by injecting their venom and digestive enzymes into her body, and eat her. When the babies are around a month old, the mother spider rolls over on her back allowing the spiderlings to clamber over her, kill her by injecting their venom and digestive enzymes into her body, and eat her. 

In earwig nation, the idea of unconditional maternal love isn't a given. When earwig mothers have a clutch of babies (or nymphs), the mothers will sniff out a chemical signal from the healthier ones and proceed to provide more abundant care and feeding to those babies. The babies that are identified as hungrier and less robust will be given less attentive parenting and feeding. 

Mama Panda is a coldhearted, favorite-choosing shrew of a parent. Or a little less dramatically: Mama Panda will often give birth to two babies but almost always only raises one.  Panda moms have to expend an enormous amount of energy to even digest their own food, and providing milk or resources for little ones is extremely difficult. By concentrating their energy on one of the babies, the chance of having one healthy offspring seems better than having two weak progeny.

We have no shortage of stories about infanticide in nature. Most of us who have been in a fourth-grade classroom know that hamsters are one of the most well-known creatures to devour their young, along with mice and other rodents. But long-tailed skinks that inhabit the island of Lanyu (just off the coast of Taiwan) If they feel they're threatened by predators, the skinks immediately gobble up their own eggs.

INTERVIEW: Deb Wilk, bipolar disorder

WELCOME TO WEDNESDAY WITH WOMEN

I have the absolute honor of introducing writer and children's author Deb Wilk who has been diagnosed as having BIPOLAR DISORDER. She is my first interviewee on this mental health condition and I could not have wished for a better person to interview on this subject. In her interview she is candid and insightful about every aspect of living with bipolar disorder. I have often said mental illness can not be understood by a non-sufferer if the sufferer themselves don't understand how the illness affects them. Deb Wilk is completely in tune with herself as she lives a fulfilling happy life managing a chronic health condition enabling her to be an invaluable resource on the subject for others through her blog. I cannot express enough what a gem of a interview this first of many interviews, I hope, on Bipolar Disorder is for my blog audience who have been diagnosed with this illness or know someone with this illness.

1.      When were you formally diagnosed as having bipolar disorder and did you accept the diagnosis at that time?

I was formally diagnosed with bipolar disorder at the age of 37. I did accept my diagnosis gratefully. I had known that I was mentally ill from the time I was 17 and had been searching for a diagnosis. Finding that diagnosis after two decades of suffering was actually a relief.

2.      Did you have preconceived ideas about mental illness before your diagnosis?

I had no preconceived ideas about mental illness in general before my diagnosis. The only preconceived idea I had was the personal knowledge that I, myself was mentally ill.

3.      Did you immediately share your diagnosis with family, friends, or romantic interest?

My husband was with me on my journey to discover what was “wrong” with me. So, he knew immediately when I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. I did not share my diagnosis with anyone else at all. Little by little, I told family members about the illness. This was mostly because my moods and behaviors made it difficult to hide the diagnosis. I now share the diagnosis with everyone who will “listen” through my blog.

4.      Did you have to adjust your lifestyle/career/parenting/social life due to bipolar disorder?

I had to adjust everything due to bipolar disorder. I had to learn to live life in moderation, careful to adjust my sleep cycle, my diet and exercise, and to guard against anything that might trigger a manic or depressive episode. Socially, I had to gather a “support network” of special friends and family around me who were loving, supportive, and who would be honest with me if they felt that my moods might be degenerating. As a parent, I had to learn to be far more patient and reasonable than I had been prior to my diagnosis and treatment. My career had always been tricky. I was a workaholic in both school and in my early career. This fueled my mania, which further fueled my workaholism. It worked for me until I crashed. I had to learn to slow down. That was even more difficult than the manic-workaholic cycle.

5.      How does the mania side affect you as well as the depressive side or show up in your life?

Occasionally, mania has given me tremendous energy that makes me feel like I can accomplish anything. This is especially true when I am working on some type of creative or work-related project. However, more often than not, I am extremely irritable and unfocused when I am manic. Due to the fact that I am working on many creative projects these days, I must control this mood state with the coping skills I’ve learned so I don’t transition to mania. Depressive episodes are more common and harder to control. For instance, I went through an episode a year ago that lasted for nearly 6 months and was unable to do much of anything. (This was caused by the fact that I stopped taking an anti-depressant “booster” medication.) Depression is far more sneaky than mania. I don’t always feel it coming.

6.      One thing about being bipolar is guilt/regret about certain actions you may have done during mania/depression. Have you experienced this? Share if you can.

I feel regret about so many things I did when I was manic. There were too many violent episodes to count, particularly directed against my husband. I am blessed in that he has always stood by me and never held any of those actions against me, understanding that it was the illness, not me, doing the things that I did. The one thing I deeply regret is that I was not a good mother to my children prior to diagnosis and stabilization. Although they have forgiven me and also understand that the illness drove my behavior, they are clearly scarred. I will never forgive myself for that. 

7.      Do you have to have a recovery time/period? If so, how important is it to your well-being?

Although I had that one bout of depression last year, my moods are normally very stable. I take very good care of myself and do everything I’m supposed to do. On a very regular basis, I meditate, practice deep breathing and yoga, and spend quiet time alone. I write a lot and do additional things that make me happy. Doing this consistently is terrific for my well-being.

8.      Bipolar disorder is difficult to treat with medicine. Everyone is different and usually must try out several medications or a cocktail of medications. Have you experienced this and how did it affect you going through trial and error of taking different medications?

I am on a cocktail of 6 different medications. It took an exceedingly long time to get this cocktail exactly right and I’m not exaggerating when I say it was probably 4 - 6 years before it worked well. We had to start with one medication, swap it for a different one, and adjust dosages. Then we tried another and adjusted dosages again. This continued ad nauseam. Sometimes when a new medication was added, an old medication had to be dropped. I have always had difficulty finding medications that fight my depression. Even now, we have had to add a “booster” medication to help the anti-depressants. That one is a miracle. I was never affected physically going through the trial and error of taking different medications, just mentally when a new medication did not have the desired effect. The disappointment was crushing because the process was so long. The cocktail I am on now, however, has been a game changer for me.  

9.      At this point in your life do you believe your bipolar disorder is managed? If not do you believe it can be? Are you able to live an enjoyable life now?

My bipolar disorder is exceedingly well managed, and I am leading a wonderful life. My husband and I are retired now and are having a great time together. We share many common interests but give each other space as well. In that space, I spend a lot of time writing. I have my blog, but I also have a children’s novel, “The Cottage at Clover Hill”, with a publisher. And I am working with an editor to put a book on bipolar disorder together, too. When I’m not doing that, my husband and I are living at our vacation home on the rocky coast of Maine or enjoying our peaceful Victorian in the Lakes Region of New Hampshire. We like to travel extensively as well. Yes, it’s a wonderful life.

I live in Laconia, New Hampshire, USA. I also have a vacation home in Wells, Maine, USA

My social media platforms are: Twitter: Deb Wilk@LivingBipolar   FB: livingpbdeb    LivingBipolar blog: https://livingbipolar.blog 

Please show Deb Wilk support by commenting, sharing, and following her on her social media.

IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO PARTICIPATE IN WEDNESDAY WITH WOMEN DM me or e-mail me at rizerfall@yahoo.com. 

 

What Makes Me Angry and Sin-g?

The Sound of Music has a famous song "These are a few of my favorite things" and it is such a cheery song filled with cute little things. I bet you're humming it right now. How sweet.

In the movie a family's newfound happiness is interrupted by Hitler and his need for dominance through war. 

Country music is often the brunt of jokes because the man is always left by his woman or dog. People are waiting for the country song where the self-driving car leaves the poor old cowboy. On the other hand, any and everything can happen to you in Blues songs without anyone making fun of you. Elton John said, I Guess That's Why They Call Them the Blues and we all nod with understanding.

If I was able to make a list of things that upset me, it would be something like this and I don't think there is a song for them yet, or maybe...:

 1. Fake News: There is no spin because it is all mean, divisive, brainwashing, calculated fabrication and twisting of words and deeds. But do I watch it regularly? You bet. It is like a car wreck; I just can't believe the destruction and injury right in front of me. You stare in awe and shock unable to process the carnage. It is shocking and sad at the same time. SONG: Tell Me lies tell me sweet little lies by Fleetwood Mac

I watch because I also want to know what dangerous people are thinking and talking about. When the media can rouse people to do violent things that is mind control and manipulation for a bad motive. What happened to people being decent just because? Fake News has a right to exist, and I have the right to disagree with their opinions on current events. Even stating you dislike their cable broadcasts opens a person up for brutal attacks by its faithful viewers. Fake News is a money-making machine and there is no water too deep for them to wade into for a dollar. SONG: For the Love of Money by The O'Jays

 2. RACISM: I believe racism should have been classified as a mental illness by now. It is a state of living that hurts/hinders happy living for the sufferer and those around them. The racist does not believe their life is affected by racist ideology and that's how mental illness works. The sufferer cannot realize the affects the illness is having on their own lives. Violent crimes including murder has been executed by people with an aversion or out and out hate for a person because of the color of their skin. Once the violence is executed upon the person of color it is called a hate crime, but mental health intervention should have occurred beforehand. Family knew racism was skewing their family member's thoughts to the point of potential violence, but believed it was "normal" hate with no possible consequences. Racists normalize hate. Isn't that ABNORMAL? SONG: Black or White by Michael Jackson

 3. SEXISM: As a Christian woman, it has become apparent that any defense that I present in regard to women and religion is called Feminist Theology. Labeling a woman as a feminist if she declares a right to an occupation, she is qualified for deemed/claimed solely for men by men and want equal pay for said occupation is supposed to be an insult. There is no such word for men when they choose an occupation, they believe they are qualified to have. Women do not have a woman ONLY occupation. SONG: I'm A Woman by Peggy Lee

Take some of this: I am a perfectly formed woman that God (not Satan) gave a functioning brain that enjoys the Bible, Salvation, etc., and I am not afraid to open my mouth and witness, preach, teach, counsel, anyone in need. That is that and I don't care how you label it. To be a Christian requires ACTION and oh, boy am I active!!!! SONG: Eye of the Tiger by Survivor

 4. MENTAL HEALTH: We continue to live in an era where the majority of those incarcerated in prison have mental health issues that we have not yet learned how to address. We have a growing homeless population also suffering from mental health issues and we can't decide what to do with them either. I understand mental illness is a difficult illness to manage and can be costly. There is not a quick fix, but the stance of ignoring it does not work. If there can be education and intervention early in growth and development of people maybe there can be better outcomes. SONG: Everybody Hurts by REM

We do physical exams on children monitoring their growth and development. Maybe there should be mental health physicals yearly as well for children or at doctor appointments for those with a family history of mental health issues and readily available resources to intervene with little or no cost. SONG: The Greatest Love of All by Whitney Houston

We ARE doing better at taking the stigma out of having mental health issues, but the statistics prove there are many suffering mentally and are more than likely falling through the gap. SONG: One by Three Dog Night

5. MY OLD SELF: I have spent a lot of years somehow focused on doing what was right and expected of me and not doing a thing that I wanted to do. Move over world. I am going for the absolutely crazy things that I want to do and you don't have to like it, agree with it, or approve it. Get all of the labels out and dust them off. I am on a mission to be ME and enjoy it. Look out for me doing the one thing I really love, speaking up and out about WOMEN. SONG: I Am Woman by Helen Reddy

I have found myself in many male dominated fields of employment (military/Seminary). At many times there was conflict with me being there. Because I clashed it was easy to think the problem was me and I may have had a problem with authority figures because I was always under the instruction of men. Then it was easy to believe I was in a place I should not be if it's such a daily struggle. Now I have written a book about manhood throughout history and I am being told I can't have such a book because I am a woman. SONG: Happy by Pharrell Williams

6.  GIVING UP: We are all on our own individual journey and we are to live it out. Opposition is always the partner of great things. We see success and believe it happened overnight when there has been years of struggle and rejection and many who did not have the opportunity to see their work flourish, but they gave it their all. SONG: Don't Stop Me Now by Queen

We shouldn't give up on politics when our party doesn't win and we shouldn't become so loyal to a particular party until it hurts our Democracy. We should continue to not tolerate racism and sexism and protect each individual's right to exist. We should continue to learn mental health matters and its just another part of being healthy. Mental illness is not a shortcoming or flaw or something to not acknowledge. It is just another illness or health issue to address as one of the many illnesses the human body may have to confront in life. We all should strive to live our most authentic lives living into our gifts and talents enriching our own lives and the lives of others. SONG: What A Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong 

The things that make you mad should make you better. Two wrongs never make a right. I have witnessed women who feel mistreated by men become women who strongly dislike men and vice versa. This does not make the woman or man better, just bitter. How can one show up in the world in a healthy way being bitter? The Bible says in Ephesians 4:26 "Be angry, yet do not sin." Wise words to live by. I say be angry and sin-g. SONG: What the World Needs Now by Dionne Warwick 

So I ask you, WHAT MAKES YOU ANGRY and is there a song for that?