Donald Trump's Lies

Kamala Harris said in the 2024 Presidential Debate of her opponent Donald Trump, (paraphrasing) "He is going to tell lies. It is what he does." She was proven correct. CNN reports former President Donald Trump delivered more than 30 false claims during Tuesday's presidential debate against Vice President Kamala Harris. Even though the majority of commentators, news outlets, and major Republicans said he did horribly in the debate, Donald Trump proclaimed he won the debate. WHY! And why does many of his voting followers believe him and repeat he did well in the debate?

His lies are dangerous and vicious at times. Even when millions of people laugh at his OUTRAGEOUS lies such as, "People (Haitians) are eating dogs", he doubles down and continue to PUSH his lie. As with this lie, his followers spring into action, resulting in this case with bomb a threat to government facility. Why does he continue to LIE?

Mark Twain said that a LIE travels halfway around the world while the truth is still putting its shoes on. Actually, that itself is a lie – Twain probably said no such thing and the true origins of the quote remain murky. 

In a study published in early 2018 in the journal Science, three researchers at MIT analyzed around 126,000 stories tweeted by around three million people between 2006 and 2017. Researchers found that the lies travelled faster and farther than the truth. For instance, true tweets rarely reached more than 1,000 people, whereas the most widely shared false tweets reached as many as 100,000 people. Falsehoods were 70% more likely to be retweeted than the truth, and it took true tweets six times as long as lies, on average, to reach 1,500 people. 

Why would people lie for likes, retweets, shares, and comments whether good or bad? A ‘like,’ ‘comment,’ or ‘share’ on social media triggers the same dopamine-driven reward pathways in the brain that are activated by eating food, winning money, or even taking some drugs. Can Donald Trump get high from lying? Do other people on social media get high from likes? Many believe the number of followers you have on social media is what is most important. But if a post gets a lot of likes but the overall follower count is low, it's often a sign that the influencer has a highly engaged audience. I CRAVE more likes on my posts and blogs but I'm not willing to lie for them.

MIT team found that lies tended to be more novel and exciting than the truth. The lies were also better at triggering an emotional response – tweets that users sent in reply to a lie often contained words conveying their surprise or disgust. Radical ideas: We like being lied to - BBC Science Focus Magazine. This may be one reason Donald Trump is popular with his political base. Trump definitely surprises people with his comments as well as disgusts them.

This astonishing jump in falsehoods (lies) is the story of Trump’s tumultuous reign. By the end of his term, Trump had accumulated 30,573 untruths during his presidency. Averaging about 21 erroneous claims a day. What is especially striking is how the tsunami of untruths kept rising the longer he served as president and became increasingly unmoored from the truth. Trump averaged about six claims a day in his first year as president, 16 claims a day in his second year, 22 claims a day in this third year—and 39 claims a day in his final year. Put another way, it took him 27 months to reach 10,000 claims and an additional 14 months to reach 20,000. He then exceeded the 30,000 mark less than five months later.

On average, people tell 1-2 lies per day. This may seem like a small number, but it adds up quickly over time. If you do the math, that's between 365 and 730 lies per year. Donald Trump exceeds this yearly average. Research indicates pathological lying can occur because of low self-esteem and a false sense of self. People who lie pathologically may want others to view them positively, making things up to make them look better. Their desire to create a false sense of self could indicate that they are unhappy with themselves. Many have asserted Trump must have low self-esteem or a mental illness based on how often he lies.

You may be thinking everyone hates a liar. Donald Trump proves that is not always true. There are times and people who don't mind being lied to and sometimes want to be lied to. Here are a few instances when people don't mind lies.

• Novelty: Lies can be more exciting than the truth.
• Emotional response: Lies can trigger an emotional response.
• Sharing: Sharing lies can make people feel good.
• Social harmony: Minor lies, like saying "Of course, I'm not angry you were 40 minutes late," can be acceptable in moderation to prevent conflict or hurting someone's feelings.
• Vulnerability: People may believe lies when they feel too vulnerable to face the truth and its consequences.
• Appearance: People may lie to appear honest when telling the truth might make them look dishonest.

Often, people want to be lied to because they can't accept the truth. Lies give validation when they need it when the truth eventually emerges, to have 101 ways to justify their beliefs and to cast the other party as the villain. Supporters of Trump use the many falsehoods of Trump to justify voting for a convicted felon. Employers don't higher convicted felons because they doubt their character. The Right does not question Donald Trump's character but feed on his lies which gives validation to their fears and anger. Some may feel a kinship with a known liar.

60% of people lie at least once in a 10-minute conversation.

Men lie 6 times a day on average, while women lie 3 times a day on average.

40% of people lie on their resumes.

90% of people lie on their online dating profiles.

80% of women admit to lying to their partner about their spending habits.

50% of teenagers admit to lying to their parents about their whereabouts.

People are more likely to lie over the phone than face to face.

81% of people lie about their height, weight or age online.

Politicians lie on average once every five minutes during a debate. 27+ Lying Statistics: The Truth About Lying (2023) brightfuturesyn,com.

It seems lying is a part of the HUMAN experience. People lie. It is when people PREFER a lie instead of the truth is when we begin to lose our HUMANITY. If anything, Donald Trump proves he has lost his humanity. It is evident every time he speaks before a microphone or crowd. 

The Honeymoon Is Over!

In a new relationship or newly married? Then you are in what people call the "honeymoon phase."

The honeymoon phase is the early stage of a relationship when couples experience intense feelings of love, passion, and excitement. It's characterized by a heightened sense of closeness, infatuation, and carefree happiness. During the honeymoon phase, you might:

• Feel like you want to be with your partner all the time.
• Miss your partner as soon as they leave.
• Feel hopeful about your future together.
• Learn more about each other's personalities.
• Explore your intimacy.
• Have a lot of fun together.

The honeymoon phase can last anywhere from six months to several years. Some couples don't have a honeymoon phase, or their honeymoon phase may be drawn out over time. The honeymoon phase will fade with time, but love should grow with time. The honeymoon phase is exciting because it's too soon to know your partner's full personality, with all its positives and negatives. However, you'll naturally transition out of the honeymoon phase when the realities of life start to creep in, and hard conversations start to bubble to the surface.

We all love the honeymoon phase of relationships when we don't quite realize our chosen one is a flawed, annoying human with red flags blowing in the wind. This made me wonder what the opposite of a honeymoon phase is called. My first thought was the "murder phase" because once you begin noticing how irritating and infuriating you 'loved one' is, the more you feel like murdering them. But the term 'murder phase' does not lead one to believe there was any love at all so that term may be too extreme. But none-the-less, we eventually enter you're on my last nerve, I can't stand you phase if we remain in long-term relationships.

Relationship experts say the prime number years of relationships are often the hardest, such as 1, 3, 7, 11, 13, 17, 19, 23, and 29. These years often correspond with significant transitions and pressure points in marriage.

The stages of a relationship have been divided for your easy consumption:

HONEYMOON = Start to 1 year.  You're connecting with someone you find exciting and who finds you exciting. You're eager to learn about them, can't get enough of them, and have all of those passionate feelings that make dating so thrilling. There is so much anticipation, curiosity, nervousness, and wonder.

BACK-TO-REALITY = 1-2 years. This is where things get real in a different way; you'll likely approach topics that are uncomfortable, you'll probably meet each other's friends and/or family, and you might realize some things about each other that possibly annoy you or deserve a conversation.

DECISION MAKING = 2-3 years. Everything is out, exposed, and on the table in this stage of a relationship. You probably know each other's traumas, hang-ups, weaknesses, communication struggles, and most profound needs and fears. It's all out there: You are fully emotionally in the nude. This can be a complicated phase if the relationship feels like it isn't going to work out; it can feel even more painful to lose someone after they have experienced you in all your forms and you've experienced them in all of theirs.

SETTLING DOWN = 3 + years. This part is refreshing because you feel known and have the privilege of truly knowing your partner — it's beautiful and sweet while also being relatively predictable, in a comforting way. The relationship has likely developed its own language for navigating the world together. Of course, this time period won't always be sunshine, rainbows, and unicorns, but it will likely be easier to navigate uncomfortable conversations, situations, and shortcomings because of the years of practiced communication.

These phases or stages are PRE-MARRIAGE, before the murder stage I alluded to. Divorce lawyers, psychologists, and researchers have slotted years of marriage into periods and have rated them based on their risk of divorce:

• Years 1–2: Very Risky.
• Years 3–4: Mild Risk.
• Years 5–8: Very Risky.
• Years 9–15: Low Risk.
• Years 15 and over: Low to Mild Risk.

We all have heard of the seven-year-itch. The seven-year itch, as it’s called, is a term that describe feelings of being restless or dissatisfied in a relationship — typically at that seven-year mark. In 1955, Marilyn Monroe starred in a film called The Seven Year Itch, in which a married man becomes so infatuated with her that he starts planning to cheat on his wife. The man has been reading a psychiatrist’s manuscript, which claims that all men cheat in their seventh year of marriage — which is exactly how long he’s been married. While research outcomes vary somewhat, the percentage of divorces, particularly in first-time marriages, tends to spike around the seven- or eight-year mark.

Of course, by the seven-year mark, partners are well past the honeymoon phase — and issues may have begun to arise. “With added time, marital struggles can include issues like poor communication and listening skills, a lack of empathy, and partners having unrealistic expectations of one another,” Dr. Borland explains. The seventh year of marriage may have symptoms of the 'itch' which includes:

A lack of physical and/or emotional intimacy.

Poor communication

Increased conflict, including arguing, hurtful words or criticism.

Keeping secrets from your partner.

Not spending much or meaningful time together.

Taking one another for granted and/or feeling unappreciated.

A lack of trust.

Fantasizing about infidelity

There may be some truth to the seven-year-itch because when marriages end, usually some time has passed since the wedding. In fact, the average length of a marriage prior to divorce is eight years. Some of the most common reasons for divorce include disagreements over money, infidelity, lack of communication, passive aggressive behavior and more. Other reasons for divorce include longer life expectancy, which may compel older couples to divorce, or the mental and emotional strain that comes with having young children. 

If you make it past year eight, then comes year ten.

“After a decade together, turning into roommates becomes a big risk as partners can slowly over the years take their focus off of each other and give all of their attention to dealing with day-to-day life,” Kurt Smith, a therapist who specializes in counseling men, told HuffPost. “Couples can easily turn into partners in managing a family or life, rather than partners in love.”

Partners can become bored with each other.  Boredom in a marriage is usually a sign that you and your partner have started taking each other ― and the relationship ― for granted, said psychotherapist, Tina Tessina.

Your sex life may fade. A couple's sex life may ebb and flow over the years for any number of reasons: physical or mental health issues, having kids, side effects of certain medications, stress, relationship problems, and sleep issues, among many others. Sex therapists say those dips are totally normal. But if you’re not committed to getting back on track, the sexual dry spells can end up lasting longer and longer, leaving one or both partners feeling rejected and disconnected.

“Many couples sacrifice their dreams in order to maintain stability when initially building a relationship and family,” couples therapist Kari Carroll said. “But by 10 years, they are realizing that life is calling, and they must negotiate how to help both themselves and their partner achieve greater fulfillment.”

“Early on in marriage, we can have a great amount of graciousness with each other as our love for each other makes up for all shortcomings or failures,” Smith said. “Sadly, as a marriage matures, the patience can fade.”

Early on in a relationship, you’ll find any excuse to celebrate: your eight-month anniversary, making it through a tough week of work or National Margarita Day. But as time goes on, those celebrations may become less and less frequent.

There seems like there are several reasons for a marriage, once out of the honeymoon phase, to enter Death Valley. But people have had long lasting marriages. HOW!!

This is what people who have been married for over 25 years have to say:

KEEP THE PEACE. Try not to fight like high schoolers—don’t play games, give the silent treatment, argue over the same things over and over, or bring up past issues in every subsequent fight.

KEEP GROWING. Expect and accept change. No one remains stagnant for twenty-five years, nor should they. You may sometimes feel like you’re with someone different than the person you married long ago. But if basic values, ethics, and morals are the foundation of a person’s character, growth can add to marital satisfaction instead of taking away from it.

STAY FLEXIBLE. Roll with the punches. As this past year has shown, you have to keep reinventing your relationship to withstand what has been thrown at you. Never consider yourself too old to switch up ‘roles’ within the marriage—if you change things up, you’ll have a fresh window into your partner’s life.

SHOW YOUR LOVE. It’s important to do little things on a regular basis to show your love.

DON'T KEEP SCORE. Don’t keep score or rate who does more. A good partner knows when to step in, when to take over and when to encourage you to keep moving forward—not get caught up in keeping tabs. 

KEEP LAUGHING. 

DON'T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF. Remember it’s a marathon, not a sprint, so pace yourself and pick your battles carefully. It’s easy to argue about the silliest of things but does it really matter how the dishwasher gets loaded or the car gets packed before going on a road trip? You come to realize it’s crazy to ruin an evening together or a trip away over stuff like this.

KEEP IT A PARTNERSHIP.

FINISH THE FIGHT. Never go to bed mad at each other—end a fight then and there so nothing carries over into the next day. And don’t lose sight that every couple fights, it’s about how well you move on and process things that matters.

SUPPOERT EACH OTHER'S INTERESTS. Having separate interests is key to a happy marriage. 

REMAIN FRIENDS. For a marriage to be successful, both husband and wife need to view themselves as partners—you are no longer just yourself, you have another half to constantly consider.

ACKNOWLEDGE WHO YOU ARE MARRYING. Be sure you’re marrying your friend. You need to really, really, really like the person you are marrying just the way they are as there’s no changing someone after the fact.

KEEP THE NORTH STAR IN SIGHT. Be determined to see it through—divorce is never an option. Be willing to follow the journey.

Those married people put in a lot of work!! One BIG reason they probably made it to 25 years of marriage and beyond, is they never called or entertained that their marriage was in a 'murder phase." All of the work they put into each other, and marriage was for it to LIVE, not DIE. 

Whether the seven-year-itch is real or not, an itch is just that, an itch. Itches go away even without scratching. Marriages can go well beyond the honeymoon phase with thought and effort. Prime numbers be damned! You picked each other for a reason. They were your ONE. Surely, those 15 annoying things they do, do not outweigh the fact that they chose you and you chose them.

Are You Considered Ugly If You Are Over 50?

DO YOU LIKE YOUR AGE? ARE YOU FRIENDS WITH YOUR AGE?

The general consensus is that the age of 50 is more like the new 30. But we know it is the people 50+ making this statement and not those who are under the age of 50. So, the younger people laugh and say of course an old person is going to claim they are not old. But 50 is 50 no matter how you slice it right? Is it true 50+ year olds want to be 30 somethings?

On average, 69% of women aged 45–60 reported feeling at least six years younger than their chronological age. Women in their fifties still feel sexy, vibrant, beautiful and desirable. And the truth being told, women 50 and over, look fantastic if they have taken care of themselves throughout their lives. They are still dating, a part of the fashion scene, and active socially. That's why culture has added the word MILF.

The American Academy of Facial Plastic and Recon­structive Surgery (AAFPRS) conducted a survey of ap­proximately 500 women between the ages of 45–60 to find out what they think about the changing face of 50. The general consensus is that 50 is more like the new 30. 

Now, more and more men and women are not happy with just looking 10 years younger, mostly because they feel closer to 20 years younger. This is especially true in South Florida, where image and youth are very much looked at. People are invested in LOOKING younger because they are LIVING longer. In the past, they didn't care how they looked 50 and beyond because death was knocking at their door. That is no longer true. Today, for those 50 and over, looking younger isn't an attempt to be "in" with the 30 somethings with all of their problems the older person has already overcome. We don't WANT to be you. Been there done that.

Despite wars, economic upheaval, and climate change, global life expectancy has increased markedly over the past 70 years, from 45.7 years in 1950 to 72.6 in 2019; even with the drop caused by COVID-19, we are still outliving our parents and grandparents by a significant margin. Today, living into the 90s or even the 100s is more likely than ever before, particularly with a commitment to making healthy life choices, to say nothing of large-scale improvements in healthcare, sustainability and infrastructure that also increase longevity at the societal level.

All this added longevity necessitates a review of our career and health habits. Back in the day, people worked for 25-35 years, usually until they were in their late 50s. The average age of retirement in the United States was 59 in 1991; you would then expect maybe 10 more good years, 15 if you were lucky. By 2022, that average age had gone up to 66 — and now, people are living 20 to 30 years longer than that.

A 50-year-old who works out regularly and with high intensity intervals can be just as fit as someone three decades younger, according to a study in Medicine & Science in Sports & Exercise. There is no magic the young have to looking good. They are not favored by the gods over the 50+ year olds. Granted, a 50-year-old will never look like a 20-year-old, but youth does not have the market on what is attractive and seen as beautiful and healthy. Young men and women are using all available resources they can find to also look their best. Cosmetic aisles and medical offices are not solely littered by desperate older people looking for the fountain of youth. All AGES look for ways to look and feel their best.

To physically look less than 50 a person can smooth out their forehead. Unless you have bangs, there is no easy way to conceal forehead wrinkles. And as one of the biggest signs of aging skin, a wrinkled forehead is one of the first things you will want to have fixed. Luckily, with non-invasive injectables like Botox, you can temporarily relax the muscles in your forehead, and smooth out your wrinkles in no time at all. ALL AGES USE BOTOX.

Getting rid of a double chin can be helpful to look younger. As you age, you start to gain fat in places of your body that you never dreamed of when you were in your twenties, including your chin. If you have started to develop a double chin and can’t seem to get rid of it with diet and exercise, Dr. Fiona Wright can help. By using non-invasive procedures like VelaCONTOUR, Dr. Wright can shrink the fat cells in your chin and give you back a more taut appearance.

Hollowed skin shows age and should go. It’s rare that you see an elderly individual with smooth, full skin. Once you hit your fifties, you may notice volume and collagen loss in your cheeks and across your face. Luckily, by using fillers like Restylane and Juvederm, Dr. Fiona Wright can plump up your face and give you back the glow you had in your twenties. On Tic Tok there are tweens showing you their facial cleansing and moisturizing regimen. Ageless beauty seems to take work and is not a punishment for aging.

Let’s face it: nobody wants to look their age. The young person can't wait to be an adult, older, and older people want to maintain their looks while enjoying the fruits of having aged.

One positive attribute of being 50 and beyond obtained and which does not want to be relinquished is age lends a sense of urgency to doing things you’ve put off and finishing things you’ve started. It also makes you deeply grateful for the fact that you’re still here. As a million memes attest to, ageing is a gift not everyone gets to enjoy.

The utter joy of not caring about stuff is one of the most thrilling developments of life many 50 and older relish. They still care about important things, but the small stuff seems to roll off of their backs more easily. 50's gives such joy to realize that it ALL doesn’t matter, and to let it go.

Once those 50+ realize and accept that the first flourish of youth and beauty has gone – that actually, it’s quite hard work keeping up with that too. Knowing that a FIRST flourish means there can be a SECOND flourish. Yes, beauty isn't a one-time fleeting occurrence. Wisdom, from living, teaches there is beauty in every stage in life in many different THINGS and WAYS. Personal, physical beauty is such a small part of living a full life. It seems 50+ can lend itself to having a beautiful MIND.

An aged person begins to know what suits them and stop worrying about it and focus more on what works for them. There’s a huge sense of relief in not being part of that rat race and to largely stop worrying about what other people think about you, and you find yourself doing what the hell you like. 

Hopefully as a person ages, reaching that half-a-century age, they become happier in their own skin, even if it’s not as pert as it used to be, and laugh more easily. With joy they have become better company; kinder, softer. That they let that hard, combative edge that used to make them challenging to spend time with, blunted, and they are a better person for it. Along with being kinder, hopefully also, comes the wisdom and the grace to say no to things more often – which is an act of being kind to oneself. 50+ can become a time of no longer doing crap that you’re supposed to like but secretly hate. Freedom is a beautiful thing in its own right. 

No one has to pity the 30-year-olds or those 50+.  Those 50 and beyond can remember life when it was so much harder at that age, having to fumble your way through life, trying to be a parent and career woman/man and trying to strap on a social life, and pretend to have it all when inside, you’re actually bewildered and exhausted. Those under 50 cannot even begin to want or desire a time when the workplace is saying they are no longer valued or needed, and the doctor is prescribing a new medication at each office visit for a new health concern. When the body crackles and aches with each move and there are lines on the face announcing your long journey of life.

For me, your age is just that, YOUR age. It has been filled with a life only you can live. The way you look at the time of your AGE has nothing to do with the soul, spirit, personality inhabiting the aged body. We need to think about the present that is wrapped under the tree on Christmas day. For a second, the recipient of the gift may exclaim how pretty the present is wrapped but then in a violent frenzy (most of the time) they tear off the wrapping with much anticipation to discover what is inside. Even the most horribly wrapped gift with the ugliest wrapping paper will never be declined to be opened.

Be the present that you are and hopefully, with an ounce of grace, the least thing a person will say about you in gratitude is, "IT WAS THE THOUGHT THAT COUNTED."

Are You Beautiful or Cute?

One thing I have noticed is that people call me CUTE. I will go shopping and people will say, "Oh, your hair is so cute, or your outfit is so cute." I have never heard anyone say, "Oh, my gosh, you are so beautiful." When I was in my early 40's, I wondered why I was called CUTE and not beautiful and was there a difference?

The first definition of cute is appealing in a pretty or endearing way. I believe when women compliment me and call me cute, they find what I'm wearing and how I chose to put my outfit together along with the way I styled my hair - pretty. My fashion style is a little boho mixed with a little mischief or eccentricity. I like to wear something a little surprising. Whether that is the costume jewelry I choose, shoes, or purse I wear, I try to wear at least one thing a little eye catching, and even my hair may be the focal point. So, I guess CUTE may be the appropriate response.

But MEN always call me CUTE. They usually have a mischievous smile when they say I am CUTE which somehow always made/makes me blush and also have a mischievous smile. I could/can never understand what was going on with this type of exchange. That is until I saw the second definition for CUTE. The second definition for cute is sexually attractive. Wow! Now I'm even more perplexed. Men call me CUTE but never BEAUTIFUL. Why?

There is no shortage of beautiful people. There are the naturally beautiful people then there are the ASSISSTED beautiful people (cosmetic surgery). I did a blog post about beautiful people being winners. 

According to some research, people who are perceived as attractive may have an advantage in life. For example, attractive people may:

• Be more likely to get hired for jobs.
• Have stronger social skills.
• Be considered more dominant, sexually warm, mentally healthy, and intelligent.
• Be more likely to get elected to public office.
• Have an advantage in getting jobs, career advancement, salary, and tips.
• Receive more positive responses when dating.
• Have lower life pressures.

Beautiful people enjoy more perks than cute people. To be considered beautiful means you are pleasing to the senses or mind aesthetically or of a very high standard; excellent. So, being labeled as cute means I am not pleasing to the senses, yet I'm considered sexy. That's strange. Don't men want to have sex with a person who is pleasing to the senses?

The word CUTE definitely doesn't exude sex appeal on its own, but it's a positive word. Just because people associate the word with kids (My husband does hate when I call him cute) and small animals doesn't mean its degrading. Cute has two completely different meanings. A cute girl is not the same as a cute child. Therefore, if you're cute, you are attractive and desirable in your own way. Some boys find a cute girl attractive, fascinating, and possibly a sexual turn-on. They may also feel a sense of pride if a cute girl returns their interest and attention. They may be subconsciously anticipating that cuteness will grow into adult beauty. So, I guess men believe one day I'll become beautiful?

“Evolutionary psychology theory holds that men value current fertility (found in the body) more in a short-term mate and reproductive value (found in the face) in the long term.” Men like BEAUTIFUL women more so for their body and for short term relationships. We all know how attracted a man is by a nice 'butt' and breasts. Women undergo procedures to have the rumps and breasts men want. Their attraction to these features makes a man consider the woman as HOT, not even beautiful or cute and hot women win with men.

It is said you just cannot compare both. Still, majority of boys would go for hot girls/women rather than cute girls/women. Cuteness is adorable but hotness is preferred. Yes, if someone hot is not tasteful to the heart, cute ones would always be preferred. So, I guess I will forever be cute. Are you cute, beautiful, or hot? Here is what is said to make a woman/girl cute:

She evokes a heartwarming feeling. A cute girl makes you feel safe and comfortable to be around. She gives a wholesome and heartwarming feeling. She’s a very good friend, who’s playful with her crush and loves telling jokes and messing around. CHECK

She thrives is a smaller setting. A cute girl is too timid to steal everyone's attention at a party, but she's the one who stands out in a more intimate setting. Everyone wants to be her friend since she's so friendly, approachable, ad trustworthy. If you have a problem or need advice, she's usually the first one you seek. CHECK

She's innocent or a little weird. Cute usually goes with innocent, which is why the word is usually linked with children and pets. However, it doesn't only refer to the girl's looks but also the way she behaves. When she does something or says something a little innocent or weird, you can't help but laugh and say, "Oh my God, you're adorable!" She's not doing this to stand out or to be quirky, it's just the way she is. And we love her for that. CHECK

She's not intimidating. As mentioned before, the cute girl is usually shy and shines better in small settings. She may not be the type of girl that you'd see in a bar and want to hit it off right away. But if you do want to, you'd feel less pressured than when approaching a sexy girl. CHECK

She looks cute. Next on the cute vs hot list, we have appearance. A cute girl looks cute. How do we define a cute appearance? A cute girl wears feminine clothes that enhance her soft features, making her look youthful, but not childish. CHECK

She's a lady in the streets, but a devil in the sheets. She will surprise you with the things she can do when it comes to sex. Because she may look and sound innocence, her sexuality in private may be a welcomed surprise. CHECK

She loves helping others. A Cute girl has a heart of gold. She enjoys helping people. And in a relationship, she's usually the one who takes care of her partner. CHECK

She's a romantic. She's the one who cries while watching romcoms or reading a romance novel that doesn't have a happy ending. Her head is always in her fantasies, where the love of her life is her favorite fictional character. She loves using pet names and being called by pet names. This is also why she has high expectations when it comes to love. Whoever dates her will be a very lucky guy, because he'll get cute texts from her every single day. CHECK

How many checks did you have?

If anything, cute is often preferred when people want to compliment someone, since it carries less emotional significance. Cute Vs. Hot: 16 Unique Traits that Make a Girl Very Sexy or Very Adorable (lovepanky.com)

The hot girl is confident in life and also in the bedroom. She doesn’t mind making the first move and flirting with guys. And she always makes sure that she gets whatever and whoever she likes.

A hot girl exudes sexual appeal. No matter what body shape or what size she is, the hot girl doesn’t mind flaunting her curves.

Passion makes a girl extremely sexy. A hot girl is passionate about everything she does: work, study, life, hobbies, and sex. She’s hard-working and knows exactly what she wants, which might be intimidating, but it helps her eliminate all the men who aren’t good enough for her.

Yes, a hot girl isn’t afraid to show her curves, but she can choose not to and still be sexy. The truth is, a hot girl is hot because she’s hot, not because of some article of clothing *although it can help*. Because once again, beauty is subjective.

Another difference between cute vs. hot is that the cute girl may or may not be opinionated, but a hot girl always stands her ground. She knows what she wants and what she believes in, and she won’t let anyone invalidate her feelings. In the battle of cute vs. hot, the hot girl stands out as someone who is sure of herself and doesn’t care what people think. She does what she likes, follows her dreams, and is not afraid to be herself.

To my surprise, CUTE wins out no matter what others say, in the long run, then hot or beautiful. Usually if a guy calls a girl “cute” it is much more personal and intimate than only the girl being beautiful, because any girl can just be “beautiful”. He might find something endearing or “cute” about you that also goes in hand with your appearance. 

So, thank you to any man or woman who have called me CUTE. I guess it is just my style and essence. 

The Silence of Rape

     

    If you are paying attention to the news you have heard E. Jean Carroll has accused former president Donale Trump of raping her in Bergdorf Goodman department store in the mid-1990s and then defamed her when he denied her claim. Trump has denied the assault occured. E. Jean Carroll testified in sometimes searing detail about the day she says Donald trump raped her in a department store dressing room two decades before he became president, allegations the Republican has repeatedly and vehemently denied.

    What grabbed my attention about the case was the statement she did not go to the police or the hospital after the alledged assault. The statement suggest that IF she was so hurt by the rape as she claims, why was she SILENT about it.

    When there is an assault to cause harm or what is labled as a criminal assault, people look for PHYSICAL evidence that an assault has occurred. Is there a busted lip, scratches, black eye, broken bones, knife stab, or a bullet wound. For these outward appearances of an ASSAULT people have sympathy, wants to render aid, help you find a policeman, or take you to a hospital. The assaulted person can walk around with the physical evidence able to speak for itself. But in the case of rape, there may not be any physcal wounds visible. How is sympathy or a feeling of wanting justice stirred in others when physical wounds are not present? How do they JUDGE a person has been HURT when there is nothing physical to see?

    Another thing that comes to mind is, there was no CRY for help. After the alledged rape Ms. Carroll was SILENT. There is a Bible passage in the Old Testament that addresses the silence DURING a rape. Yes. The Bible addresses rape. Duetoronomy 22:23-27 “If there is a betrothed virgin, and a man meets her in the city and lies with her, then you shall bring them both out to the gate of that city, and you shall stone them to death with stones, the young woman because she did not cry for help though she was in the city, and the man because he violated his neighbor’s wife. So you shall purge the evil from your midst. But if in the open country a man meets a young woman who is betrothed, and the man seizes her and lies with her, then only the man who lay with her shall die. But you shall do nothing to the young woman; she has committed no offense punishable by death. For this case is like that of a man attacking and murdering his neighbor, because he met her in the open country, and though the betrothed young woman cried for help there was no one to rescue her."

    The Bible passage says the woman was to CRY OUT for help if people are around but will not be faulted for NOT crying out if she is in a place where there are no people, but in both instances the man is to be punished for the crime of rape which is comparable to MURDER. The crying out part is BEFORE or DURING the rape. Why is it then women do not cry out , before, during, or after a rape?

    When a rape occurs there is a CHOICE a woman must make. If a man, larger and stronger than she is, is physically willing to assault her, she has to calculate, "Can my stregnth outmatch his?" We know automatically the answer is probably a no. Rape as you can imagine doesn't take place with people around. The lack of the presence of people is actually a prerequisite to being able to rape. Crying out when there is no one around is a moot point. Back to the calcultions a woman must make when faced with the realization, "This man is going to rape me."

     The woman pretty much knows the struggle to keep from being raped is lost based on the physical makeup of a man versus a woman. With this in mind, she knows her retaliation must be above his. Her defense has to be more brutal and violent to avoid being sexually assaulted. Her options are, 'cause greater harm.' To this critical point, a woman has to decide, "Am I capable of using a force that may lead to MURDER?"

    To many, mostly those never faced with a decision of such grave consequences, the choice will be, murder. It is assumed we all have it in us to take a life to protect our own life. But, if you ask an actual rape VICTIM what was going through their head at the time, you may be surprised at the answer.

    Many rapes are done by people the victim knows. Stranger rapes tend to be more physically violent leaving the outward physical assault evident. But, what about the "I thought I knew him rapes?" Do you want to kill a person whose family you may know or hangs out in your friend circle? Is it easy to kill the co-worker you associate with at work or work for and see daily? Or do the victim succomb with the thought, "It's easier to let it go agead and occur and be over with without resistence possibly causing me more harm than to KILL the person?" Does the victim think "My LESSER ASSAULT (I'm not saying it IS a lesser assault but society has) is better than me having to MURDER someone?"

     What about after the assault of rape? Why don't victims go strait to the police or hospital to report the assault? It's a strange thing rape victims do. They take a SHOWER after a rape. If a person is shot, they don't take a shower. If a person is stabbed they don't go take a shower. Rape victims tend to want to WASH what in their mind is the EVIDENCE left after a rape. The TOUCH itself. The MEMORY itself is what is trying to be washed away because there are no OUTWARD signs for people to run to in an effort to show compassion, help, or justice. There is nothing for the eye to rest on after a rape unless you want to look at her VAGINA. A woman would have to put her vagina on DISPLAY and say here is the evidence. She would have to put her vagina in your face for you to view the harm. The very intimate place of her, covered from view, given sight to only those she chooses, would have to be paraded around and pointed to to gain compassion and sympathy. WHO on earth wants to do that and the victim knows there is no one who wants to see that. People say, "This is where I was shot," but don't say, "This is where I was raped."

    So there is the silence of rape. The body itself can not speak and say LOOK I've been assaulted unless it was a physically violent rape where a beating took place more than likely from a struggle which did not nigate being raped. There is silence because rape does not take place in front of witnesses. The rapes usually take place where the victim felt safe with the rapist or in a safe surrounding. There is silence after the rape because proving an assault where the assault took place between your legs is not a place easily viewed by others. Photographs would have to be carried aroud and displayed by the victim. There is silence because the rapist is known by people the victim is friends with, acquainted with, work with, hope to work with, or are familiar with his family and social circle. There is silence because the victim thinks the trauma is over after the shower. They themselves look in the mirror and see no evidence of an assault. To a rape victim it can seem as though it almost didn't actually happen. It's almost to them as though they need MORE for it to have been a CRIME. Maybe because society, the judicial system, everyday life says only certian proof constituates injury. 

    It is Mental Health Awareness Month as I write this post and we have to strongly KNOW that rape causes mental health issues sooner or later and you don't have to be in a straight jacket to prove you were harmed mentally by a rape. Some of the comments being made during the trial are OFFENSIVE. The most offending statement was by Trump himself. He said his accuser was NOT ATTRACTIVE and many people agreed. Rape is not about the VICTIM'S appearance, social standing, economic standing, physical proportions, beauty, or intelligence. Rape is about there being something WRONG with the rapist! There has been hurdle after hurdle for victims of rape to overcome and being called too UGLY to rape is just another one of the SHAMING of the victim that occurs with rape. Does anyone say, "He was to UGLY to shoot?"

    There is a SILENCE to rape that is birthed with the assault. The victim is too busy asking themselves, "Why Me. Is this My fault? Why didn't I see this coming? What do I do the next time I see him? What WILL happen if I say something? Why mention this to anyone, no one likes to hear stuff like this? Am I okay? Can I keep myself together." the SELF TALK is so much until it's hard to talk to others.

    Rape is such a LOW crime to the point people can't stomach it. Shootings and robberies are on the nightly news daily, but rape is not something that should come over the airwaves into respectable family homes. Bellow I've pasted some sexual assault facts by 32 Shocking Sexual Assault Statistics for 2023, by Jennifer Kuadli, March 30, 2023,32 Disheartening Sexual Assault Statistics for 2023 (legaljobs.io) 

General Statistics about Sexual Assault Although statistics on sexual assault can’t even begin to convey the suffering of victims and their families, they can offer a glimpse into the disturbing extent of the issue.

1. In 2019, over 652,676 women were raped.This figure excludes non-rape sexual assaults but includes date rape statistics; if included, data from non-rape sexual assaults would take the figure closer to the one million mark. What’s worse, it has been rising for the last decade at an annual rate of 2.9%, and this trend shows no sign of decreasing.

2. Over 40% of women in the US have encountered sexual violence. Sexual abuse, as shown by rape and sexual assault statistics, has affected 41.8% of women in the US who have been victimized by sexual violence other than rape.

3. Nearly 80% of female sexual assault victims experience their first assault before the age of 25. Exactly 79.6% of female victims who have experienced one or more completed rape did so before the age of 25.

4. Around 20% of American males have been the victim of sexual violence. According to Rainn statistics, outside of the correctional system, most rape victims are female. However, studies show that 21.4% of males in the US have been the victims of sexual violence and have experienced this outside of any prison facility.

5. A quarter of male victims of sexual assault were under 10 years of age. According to studies, an estimated total of 28% of male victims of sexual assault in the US will have experienced their first assault at 10 years of age or younger.

6. Rape Statistics show that less than 20% of rapes are reported. It is estimated that only 19% of rapes, completed or attempted, are reported annually. This figure runs consistently across the board. The general consensus is that rape is still considered something shameful, hence victim reluctance.

7. Women and men with disabilities face twice the risk of sexual assault than able-bodied individuals. Sadly, data gathered from watchdog organizations and US sexual assault statistics have found that disabled people were twice as likely to be victims of sexual assault than able-bodied people. Statistics of sexual abuse show that the majority of these heinous assaults were carried out in care environments (both facilities and home care). Yet, they were also reported as taking place during hospital or general practitioner sessions, as well as in individual therapy sessions.

8. Nearly 20,000 sexual assaults were reported in the military last year. A study on the level of sexual assault within the military from 2010 revealed sexual violence statistics that showed a figure of 3,577, of which only a quarter took place during deployment in combat zones. The study was repeated in 2019, and the sexual assault stats showed over 19,000 sexual assaults had now taken place in the US military.

9. 7.2% of all children surveyed in 2019 had been victims of sexual assault. Child sexual abuse statistics highlight the harrowing revelation that teens aged 14 to 17 were in the highest risk category for sexual assault, with more than one in four adolescents (27.3%) having been sexually victimized during their lifetimes.

10. Approximately 70 women commit suicide every day in the US following an act of sexual violence. Women sexual assault statistics reveal some extremely disturbing facts. An estimated 70 women commit suicide daily in the US, directly as a result of sexual violence. Worryingly, this figure has grown by 2.87% over the last year.

11. Sexual violence incidents, preceded by stalking, increased by 1.9% in 2019. According to statistics and sexual harassment facts from 2019, the incidents of stalking that led to sexual assaults have increased steadily over the last year. What makes this figure even more alarming is the fact that initiatives were put in place to prevent and protect victims from such occurrences. So, governmental legislation and thinking about the issue must be reviewed.

12. During 2019, 13% of all women in California were victims of rape. Sexual harassment statistics reflect a large percentage of Californian women have been reported as having been a victim to an attempted or completed rape in 2019. Current rape statistics by state show that 13% of all Californian women are in danger of being a victim of sexual assault.

13. Statistics show that 1 in 6 US women will be raped annually in the US. Surveys and rape statistics by gender have found that 1 in 6 American women, and 1 in 33 American men has experienced an attempted/completed rape as a child or adult. This disturbing figure has been predicted to rise exponentially over the next three years.

14. Over 1.5 million women were raped by an intimate partner in 2019. Statistics on sexual harassment from the Department of Justice suggest that over 1.5 million women and 834,700 men are raped and/or physically assaulted annually by an intimate partner in the United States. This staggering figure is both disheartening and unnerving.  Experts have created focus groups to analyze and explore these sexual assault statistics by state in more depth.

Little Known Facts About Male Victims of Sexual Violence According to sexual assault statistics, males are also high-risk victims of sexual violence.

Which means that: Sexual abuse is not limited to females, and the abuse of boys has little to do with either the abuser’s or the victim’s sexual orientation.

Perhaps unsurprisingly: Male rape statistics show that most perpetrators of male sexual assault are men. These predators choose to rape both gay or straight men because rape is an act of aggression and domination, not of sexual desire.

Contrary to popular belief: Girls and women can most definitely be perpetrators of sexual violence toward males, and instances of this kind are more prevalent in society than most people realize.

In contradiction to the sweeping statement thinking of most people, male sexual assault statistics have now proved that most males who experience sexual assault (at any age) do not automatically go on to become sexual abusers.

In many cases: According to gun violence statistics, attackers can use various weapons, physical force, or even the threat of force to gain the upper hand. Others, according to rape victim statistics, may use blackmail or their position of authority to threaten someone into submission.

15. Approximately 16% of males in juvenile prisons have been sexually abused. A 2019 study by the US Center for Disease Control examined woman rape statistics in juvenile prisons for incidents and frequency of sexual violence. The results showed that 16% of males had been victims of sexual abuse, whereas over 60% of males in these facilities had encountered the threat of sexual violence.

16. In Florida alone, a staggering total of 1,477,000 men have been victim to sexual assault. In Florida, 20.4% of men, or 1,477,000 men, have been victimized by sexual violence over the last decade.

17. Over 25% of male sexual assault victims will experience their first assault before 10 years of age. According to sexual assault statistics 2019, studies and statistical analysis, in excess of 25% (27.8% to be exact) of male victims of sexual assault will probably experience their first attack by age 10 or younger.

18. Nearly 40% of adult males that experience sexual violence from an intimate partner are left with psychological scarring. Reports and studies on  US rape statistics show clearly that 39.7% of men who have experienced sexual assault from their partner such as rape, stalking or physical violence, are left with long term impacts such as Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and other types of psychological injury.

19. New York statistics show that 18% of all rapes in the city involved a male victim. According to rape statistics, extensive studies, and focus groups, 2019 involved a record high of male rape victims within the city, with a record high figure of 18% - which is 5.7% higher than 2018.

Sexual Assault Effects on Society

20. Over 80% of sexual assaults are committed by an acquaintance. Relatives, teachers, religious leaders, former spouses - unfortunately, the list of possible attackers is one of people who will most often have a very intimate relationship with the victim. Statistics on rape indicate that this connection normally results in most rape victims shying away from reporting such incidents due to obligatory or emotional pressures.

21. Almost 95% of child victims knew their sexual attacker. Rape stats by RAINN show that the vast majority percentage (93.98%) of child victims in the US in 2019 were familiar with their attacker. In almost all of these cases, as reflected by teenage sexual assault statistics, the child had spent a significant amount of time (10 plus hours, in one full duration or segmented) with their attacker prior to the sexual assault taking place.

22. The rate of false rape claims in the US is well below the 10% average mark. Although false rape claims do happen, it is important to keep in mind that the majority of rape claims are legitimate, as sexual assault statistics reveal. In fact, data collated in 2019 from false rape statistics, shows that a combined rate of 6.9% of rape claims were false. 

23. Sexual assaults cost the US billions of dollars annually. Findings from college sexual assault statistics and other reports show that although sexual assaults take heinous tolls on their victims and cause terrible emotional damage, there is another cost that is rarely factored into such tragic events - the cost on society in financial terms. According to stats on sexual abuse, when we factor in the costs of funding and running sexual assault services, the resulting lower educational aspirations (a common affliction amongst adolescents who have been the victim of child abuse), and the cost of lost earnings of victims who have been traumatized to a point where they are unable to work, the costs on the US annually are in excess of $450 billion. A staggering figure on paper, and one that has, according to stats on sexual assault, been increasing yearly by 1.8% on average.

24. 69% of rape victims in the US are women aged between 12 to 34 years old. Sexual violence figures from 2019 were significantly higher compared to sexual assault statistics 2018. The 12-34 age bracket has been known to encompass the majority of rape victims in the US on an average year.

25. Transgender college students have a 5% higher rate of getting raped than other students. After conducting studies on sexual assault statistics by gender, US colleges have reported a rise in sexual attacks on transgender students. College rape statistics about transgender, genderqueer, and gender-nonconforming (TGQN) students have shown that in 2019 an average of 23% of students were in danger of being sexually assaulted, compared to 18% of non-TGQN students. These stats are concerning because they are significantly higher than college sexual assault statistics 2018, which means the problem is getting out of control.

26. Bisexual women are more than twice as likely to victims of rape than straight women. Of all the women at the greatest risk from sexual assault in the US, bisexual women are statistically in the danger zone. Sexual abuse statistics show that 46% of bisexual women reported being a victim of sexual assault in 2019, compared to 17% of straight women.

Furthermore, sexual assault on college campuses statistics show an interesting correlation, which reveals that bisexual men face similar issues, with 47% of them being victims of sexual violence, compared to 21% of heterosexual men.

27. The majority (90%) of rape victims are female. Findings from sexual assault reporting statistics have unsurprisingly revealed that women make up the vast majority of rape victims. This figure reflects rape statistics US and includes adult victims but excludes juvenile victims, who, if included, would total 82% of all rape victims.

28. An American is sexually assaulted every 93 seconds. Sexual assaults are on the rise throughout the whole of the US. On average, state by state comparative analysis (including rape statistics by race data) shows that there are approximately 325,566 victims of rape and sexual assault (age 12 or older) in the US every year.

29. People with disabilities are twice as likely to be victims of rape and sexual assault as those without disabilities. Both males and females with disabilities experienced higher rates of victimization than able-bodied males and females. Surprisingly, rape statistics in the US show that those with a type of cognitive-functioning disability were at higher risk of violent victimization than those with any other type of disability.

30. Girls and women between the ages of 16 and 19 are 4x more likely than girls and women in other age groups to be assaulted or raped. Results gathered from numerous studies show that campus sexual assault statistics have found patterns on the locale of victims. In general, 46% of sexual assault victims were sleeping or performing another activity at home when they were victimized.

Nearly 23% were traveling to and from school or work, shopping, or running errands. Some 19% were working when they were, 9% were attending school, and 19% were doing some other activity.

31. One out of every six American females is a victim of attempted or completed sexual assault.According to sexual assault facts, one out of every six American women will most probably be the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime. This ratio has doubled in the last five years, and analysts predict the same to happen over the course of the next half a decade.

1 in 33 American men (about 3% of the total percentage of women sexually assaulted) have experienced an attempted or completed rape in their lifetime. This figure has increased by 22.4% over the last five years.

32. For every 1000 rapes in the US, 995 perpetrators will go unpunished. Studies covering unreported sexual assault statistics show that the overwhelming majority of perpetrators will escape punishment of any kind. US rape stats show that too many victims are afraid to follow through with the legalities of their claim, leading to perpetrators escaping punishment of any form.